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The Stupidity Of Objective Reviews


Written by: BitterCOld
Published: 10.05.2011


I've been batting around this column idea for a while, so fuck it, here it is.

The word "objective" gets bandied about a lot, usually it comes up when someone writes a review for an album and scores it lower than some insulted fan thinks it should be scored. Clearly the reviewer who might have only scored it "good" lacked the magic word? OBJECTIVITY.



What? You call new Iron Opeth a 9.3? It's clearly a 9.875!! OUTRAGE! UNOBJECTIVE!


(Side note: this also some times occurs when the reviewer 'overrates' the album, but I have never seen this brought up when reviewer and reader agreed on an album's worth? I guess if both think something is an 8 or 9, clearly that reviewer is objective.)

There is one fatal flaw in that logic.

A strictly "objective" review would be not only terribly boring, it would be basically useless to those interested in learning about the album being reviewed.

How so? Here so. In order to be remotely useful - and vaguely interesting - it has to be chock full of subjectivity. What follows below is an objective review of Metallica's Metallica:

___________________________________________________________________________________


In 1991 Metallica released their self-titled fifth album. The cover art features the band's logo and a coiled snake derived from the Gadsden Flag. Done in all black, it has caused this album to be also known as "the Black Album" and has drawn comparisons to the imaginary Spinal Tap album Smell The Glove.

At this point in their career Metallica featured Kirk Hammett on guitar, James Hetfield on guitar and vocals, Jason Newsted on bass guitar and backing vocals, and Lars Ulrich on drums.

Metallica consists of 12 songs and lasts over an hour. The band opted to have Bob Rock produce the album after his work on Mötley Crüe's Dr. Feelgood. Metallica spent four consecutive weeks at number one on Billboard 200, has sold more than 15,000,000 copies, and was certified 15x platinum (diamond) by the RIAA.

The songs are music with electric guitar played with distortion, bass and drums. There are guitar solos in all 12 songs. Hetfield plays an acoustic guitar on "The Unforgiven", "Wherever I May Roam", and "Nothing Else Matters".

Five of the dozen songs were released as singles and received radio play. They were "Enter Sandman", "The Unforgiven", "Nothing Else Matters", "Wherever I May Roam", and "Sad But True". Videos were also made for these five songs.

The song "Don't Tread On Me" features the motto of the Gadsden Flag, whose snake image was also found on the album cover.

___________________________________________________________________________________

I hope that was helpful. Limited to strictly objective analysis, devoid of anything subjective - such as opinion - I was handicapped in my ability to describe what this album sounds like or how it makes me feel. I cannot even use the word "metal" in describing this release as that is a subjective term in and of itself. A fellow staffer, who proofed that bit, stated, "It reads more like a fact sheet."

Well, in order to be objective, I guess fact is all you have.



An initial scan of this publication reveals it devoid of subjectivity... but I will have to run this by the Council of MetalGeeks for confirmation.


Ultimately, it is not objectivity, but subjectivity which gives the review any worth or entertainment value. I challenge any of you to look back at your favorite review (be it of a metal album on this site or a movie/book review elsewhere) and look into why you like it. My guess is in 99% of cases, it will be because the reviewer had the stones to dare to insert their opinion in to it.

Sure, it would be a plus if the guy or gal reviewing the work had one foot set in objective-land, rather than writing a review fellates the artist (with one hand cupping their balls and another plugging their anus) or bends the artist over and mounts them (without having the common decency to give them a reach around) ?

Ultimately, though, it doesn't matter. What matters is the reviewer's opinion - even if you disagree with it. Music is 99% a subjective experience dependent solely upon the listener. Not that this will matter. Team NERDRAGE will continue to froth at their keyboard and hamfist pound out ranting diatribes that call into question parental lineage of a reviewer for scoring something only somewhere between 'good' and 'very good.'






Written on 10.05.2011 by BitterCOld has been officially reviewing albums for MetalStorm since 2009.


Comments page 2 / 3

Comments: 80   Visited by: 625 users
14.05.2011 - 03:44
BobMoron

Good article! Thank you for submitting it.
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14.05.2011 - 15:52
Enemy of Reality
Account deleted
This is a very interessing discussion and being myself a student in Journalism and reviewer i get to discuss this topic a lot. To sum it up i think it does not only depends on what the reviewer writes but also on what reader expects of it. One can review a album focusing on the bright sides without bringing up the negative aspects, and still being able to be quite objective in his subjectivity. For example: it doesn't do fairness to an album to review it like: "i just hate it" without explaining why. And it certainly won't be fair and respond to what the reader expects from a reviewer, even if he hated that particular album too. Even in subjectivity you can be objective, by just explaining why you like/hate an album.
About the reader's expectations, what does someone who reads reviews expects from it?
Is it hard facts? Techinical appreciation? An excuse to buy or discard an album? Representation of it's own opinion?
The subjectivity comes not only from the reviewer side, but also from those who read it. It doesn't matter how precise, detailed or objective/subjective the review is, it will always depend on what the reader and his own subjectivity expects from the review.
In the end, reviews are just opinions, being well fundamented or not, it's up to reader to find it usefull of not, but always respecting the reviewers opinion. Is as simple as this.
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15.05.2011 - 00:31
JCJen7

Written by BitterCOld on 12.05.2011 at 20:20

Written by Marcus on 12.05.2011 at 06:51

Hmm, interesting article, but I've always felt all the people who decry reviews that don't agree with them as not being objective actually are trying to insinuate that the reviewer is biased in some way. I.e., lots of people will say an great review for an Opeth album is solely because a reviewer is a fanboy, or that a negative review is because someone just hates Opeth.

Although this is similar to objectivity/subjectivity, reviews are supposed to be subjective as they're someone's opinion but not inherently biased in their writing.


that is pretty much exactly the point. they use "objectivity" as the weapon to attempt to cut down the reviewer whose opinion they disagreed with. the "OBJECTIVITY!" battle cry, 95 times out of 100, has nothing to do with objectivity at all, just a simple disagreement on comparative values.

it's the review equivalent of the racist tag. you can't disprove a negative. take my A7X review. many people who liked the album accused me of having an agenda or an ax to grind, blah blah blah... they couldn't accept that i simply found the album boring and sub-par, so they called my objectivity into question. there is nothing i can do to disprove that accusation, even though had i liked the album, i would have written a positive review. of course, then those who really, really dislike the album might have called me out with similar accusations, just from the opposite side of the coin.


I still disagree with that review -_-
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15.05.2011 - 07:42
Hellhound

I think many people confuse objectivity with a lack of appropriate evidence to support a claim. Without the same musical background there isn't enough middle ground to accurately describe the listener experience. Thus it is up to the reviewer to attempt to relay their own opinion in a fashion that depicts what the average listener could expect from the album. The lack of "average listeners" means that there is always a possibility that someone will consider the review biased and make a scene. In order to minimize the amount of crying the reviewer has to put up with and (if you want to get ethics involved) to maintain a sense of journalistic integrity it is the writer's responsibility to ensure that adequate evidence (typically from a source that will corroborate the reviewers opinion) is provided to add credibility to the author's claims.
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16.05.2011 - 18:03
Lit. Metalhead
Account deleted
I object to this article and everything it stands for.
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16.05.2011 - 19:15
X-Ray Rod
Skandino
Written by Guest on 16.05.2011 at 18:03

I never like reading reviews because they are always wrong. The only person who is right is the artist/band who makes the CD.


I guess that was a joke because 99% of the artists/bands will say that their album is good, nothing more.
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Written by BloodTears on 19.08.2011 at 18:29
Like you could kiss my ass
Written by Milena on 20.06.2012 at 10:49
Rod, let me love you.
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16.05.2011 - 19:51
BitterCOld
The Ancient One
Written by Guest on 16.05.2011 at 18:03

I never like reading reviews because they are always wrong.


huh? my reviews are just my interpretations and impressions of an album. as discussed above, music is subjective. therefore how are 99% of reviews wrong?

the only thing wrong is you.
----
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16.05.2011 - 22:07
Lit. Metalhead
Account deleted
Written by X-Ray Rod on 16.05.2011 at 19:15

Written by Guest on 16.05.2011 at 18:03

I never like reading reviews because they are always wrong. The only person who is right is the artist/band who makes the CD.


I guess that was a joke because 99% of the artists/bands will say that their album is good, nothing more.


Thank you for noticeing.
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20.05.2011 - 06:08
Grody2themax

I agree with you that music is very subjective. However, there definitely is a level of objectivity that can be used when describing music. Personal tastes differ, but you can't write a review on personal tastes solely. When reviewing music and such, it is mostly opinion, but hopefully "good", or supported/thought out opinions. Obviously, being extremely objective or subjective when writing a review on music isn't good. I think the writer just needs to find a balance.
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20.05.2011 - 06:13
BitterCOld
The Ancient One
Written by Grody2themax on 20.05.2011 at 06:08

I agree with you that music is very subjective. However, there definitely is a level of objectivity that can be used when describing music. Personal tastes differ, but you can't write a review on personal tastes solely. When reviewing music and such, it is mostly opinion, but hopefully "good", or supported/thought out opinions. Obviously, being extremely objective or subjective when writing a review on music isn't good. I think the writer just needs to find a balance.


yet another person who somehow skipped straight to the end and missed the bit where I mentioned it being a good thing if the reviewer had one leg in objective land.
----
get the fuck off my lawn.

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20.05.2011 - 06:24
Grody2themax

Written by BitterCOld on 20.05.2011 at 06:13

Written by Grody2themax on 20.05.2011 at 06:08

I agree with you that music is very subjective. However, there definitely is a level of objectivity that can be used when describing music. Personal tastes differ, but you can't write a review on personal tastes solely. When reviewing music and such, it is mostly opinion, but hopefully "good", or supported/thought out opinions. Obviously, being extremely objective or subjective when writing a review on music isn't good. I think the writer just needs to find a balance.


yet another person who somehow skipped straight to the end and missed the bit where I mentioned it being a good thing if the reviewer had one leg in objective land.


Nope, I remember reading that specifically and I read your whole article. I guess it did come off as if I was disagreeing with you when I said "However, there definitely is a level of objectivity...". I was just stating my thoughts, and what I wrote is essentially the same thing as what you had previously mentioned but I guess I kind of wanted to expand on that in my own words.
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20.05.2011 - 17:41
The Norseman

This is why I don't like most of the reviews I see. I don't care about the reviewer taste, I care about the technical quality of the album, how good it will sound to the average person, not to the hardcore fan of the style. This is why most reviews are bad, because reviewers only express their personal taste.

Also, many times the popularity of the band has much influence in the review, you take the same album and release it under an unknown band and it would probably have a much worst note. The same happens the other way around.

I'm not saying writing a good review is easy, it's not, but I think reviewers should strive harder for a neutral and clean review.
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20.05.2011 - 19:52
Promonex
Cathemeral
Written by The Norseman on 20.05.2011 at 17:41

This is why I don't like most of the reviews I see. I don't care about the reviewer taste, I care about the technical quality of the album, how good it will sound to the average person, not to the hardcore fan of the style. This is why most reviews are bad, because reviewers only express their personal taste.

Good luck finding reviews by THE average person then.
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21.05.2011 - 06:50
BitterCOld
The Ancient One
And as far as technicality goes, i'm sure spending precious words to describe "30 second solos in the dorian mode utilizing sweep-picking and two-hand tapping" will be a huge help to people in determining whether or not something is worth shelling out $15 for.
----
get the fuck off my lawn.

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21.05.2011 - 17:33
The Norseman

Written by BitterCOld on 21.05.2011 at 06:50

And as far as technicality goes, i'm sure spending precious words to describe "30 second solos in the dorian mode utilizing sweep-picking and two-hand tapping" will be a huge help to people in determining whether or not something is worth shelling out $15 for.


When I talked about the technical aspect of the album, I wasn't saying that sort of things. How do you measure Performance, Originality, Production and Songwriting? Aren't those techincal aspects that evaluate the quality of the album? It's easy to assign a number to each but why is it a good Production? Why is it Original ? Why they show a good Performance? Those aspect have to be based on the technical aspects that make an album good or bad and not in your personal taste, because, like you said, it's not your personal taste that will determine if the album is worth $15. It might be worth to you but it might not be worth to someone else, that is why when you base your review on your personal taste the review is useless unless I compare it to other reviews and try to find some common ground that might actually tell me that perhaps it's not just personal taste talking

I give you an example. I usually listen to power/heavy metal but sometimes I like to try other styles like Black for example. Being a person that don't know much about black metal bands, where do I base myself to pick an album to listen to? The reviews? No, never. I base myself on the ratings an album has, because that is an average grade given by several persons, so the chances of it being more accurate are greater. Reviews, I'll find several reviews saying different things because most people fail to actually give an imparcial note.

This is just my opinion, I respect yours and I'm not looking to change it.

Written by Promonex on 20.05.2011 at 19:52

Good luck finding reviews by THE average person then.


Huh? Where did I ever said i wanted reviews by the average person ? and why the hell is "THE" in caps? Did you even bother reading what I said properly?
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21.05.2011 - 19:12
Promonex
Cathemeral
Written by The Norseman on 21.05.2011 at 17:33

Written by Promonex on 20.05.2011 at 19:52

Good luck finding reviews by THE average person then.


Huh? Where did I ever said i wanted reviews by the average person ? and why the hell is "THE" in caps? Did you even bother reading what I said properly?


Written by The Norseman on 21.05.2011 at 17:33

I don't care about the reviewer taste, I care about [...] how good it will sound to the average person, not to the hardcore fan of the style.

Alright, so how are you to determine when an average rating is the result of the the votes of average persons and not hardcore fans? The more obscure a release is, the higher is the percentage of votes by hardcore fans. How popular or obscure does a release have to be in your opinion then to have an average rating which reflects the taste of an average person?



Written by The Norseman on 21.05.2011 at 17:33

Reviews, I'll find several reviews saying different things because most people fail to actually give an imparcial note.

Average ratings, you'll find several websites with different average ratings for one and the same release because people (not most, but ALL) fail to actually give impartial grades.
But when reading several reviews by different reviewers, you'll find out everything that needs to be known about an album, both positive and negative. Reviewers tend to explain their rating, the average person does not.
----
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- The Mystery of Life, Vol. 841 Ch. 26
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21.05.2011 - 20:32
LordFezzington
Lost To Apathy
Written by Promonex on 21.05.2011 at 19:12

Average ratings, you'll find several websites with different average ratings for one and the same release because people (not most, but ALL) fail to actually give impartial grades.
But when reading several reviews by different reviewers, you'll find out everything that needs to be known about an album, both positive and negative. Reviewers tend to explain their rating, the average person does not.


Exactly. You only have to look at the number of muppets who give a 10 to everything released by their favourite band and a 1 to everything else just to boost their favourite's place in the charts to work out that ratings are often even less objective than reviews.

As long as a reviewer justifies (i.e. has clearly thought about and given reasons for) their opinions, then they can be as subjective as they like for all I care!
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21.05.2011 - 20:50
BitterCOld
The Ancient One
Written by The Norseman on 21.05.2011 at 17:33

I give you an example. I usually listen to power/heavy metal but sometimes I like to try other styles like Black for example. Being a person that don't know much about black metal bands, where do I base myself to pick an album to listen to? The reviews? No, never. I base myself on the ratings an album has, because that is an average grade given by several persons, so the chances of it being more accurate are greater. Reviews, I'll find several reviews saying different things because most people fail to actually give an imparcial note.

This is just my opinion, I respect yours and I'm not looking to change it.




are you kidding me? you take the album scores? those are horribly overinflated by folks who just click a number... if you had any idea how many THOUSANDS of votes i've nuked from users who create accounts just to spam 10s to "cool" artists and 1's to slag off either uncool artists or others topping the charts in direct competition to their favorites.

if you think reviews are impartial why would you expect scores to be any different? just clicking "10" is a lot easier than typing 500 words why something is a 9.8 or whatever.

you hit the nail on the head the prior paragraph. and it holds true with music, movies, books, everything. you are best off finding someone who does reviews with tastes similar to your own.
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get the fuck off my lawn.

Beer Bug Virus Spotify Playlist crafted by Nikarg and I. Feel free to tune in and add some pertinent metal tunes!
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21.05.2011 - 21:45
Guib
Thrash Talker
Omg... welcome to Objectivity War 101..

Today, we will learn to dodge questions, throw insults and argue about opinions
NO... NO it won't be productive, but eh who cares !

btw nobody's right but me
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Guib's List Of Essential Albums
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21.05.2011 - 22:27
The Norseman

This is pointless. I guess we'll have to agree to disagree.
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21.05.2011 - 22:39
Guib
Thrash Talker
Written by The Norseman on 21.05.2011 at 22:27

This is pointless. I guess we'll have to agree to disagree.


But what If I don't because I'm too stubborn to realize that opinions are always unobjective and
that I simply can't please everyone with my ways of thinking and my musical tastes.
Will this ever end ? Or will we all die in a pool of blood because we refuse to see someone
thinking differently, because obviously my way of thinking ''should'' always be the best (grin) ?
----
- Headbanging with mostly clogged arteries to that stuff -
Guib's List Of Essential Albums
- Also Thrash Paradise
Thrash Here
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26.05.2011 - 01:20
ADIresiduos

Agree! But now a days is quite easy to get an idea of how a band sounds like: you tube, metal radio, etc.; and whenever a friend of yours tells you to catch a certain band because they sound "very heavy, brutal, epic. etc", you can always check it out on the internet (90% positive that you'll find something on it). So, use technology after reading a review and decide for yourself.
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26.05.2011 - 06:07
Guib
Thrash Talker
Written by ADIresiduos on 26.05.2011 at 01:20

Agree! But now a days is quite easy to get an idea of how a band sounds like: you tube, metal radio, etc.; and whenever a friend of yours tells you to catch a certain band because they sound "very heavy, brutal, epic. etc", you can always check it out on the internet (90% positive that you'll find something on it). So, use technology after reading a review and decide for yourself.


Smart... but ya know, if everyone would check every bands and songs (and god knows theres alot of them... fuck god) then what would be the point of good 'ol reviews ? We always like the entertainement of someone expressing his opinion about a subject, especially concerning music. Don't ya think so ?
----
- Headbanging with mostly clogged arteries to that stuff -
Guib's List Of Essential Albums
- Also Thrash Paradise
Thrash Here
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26.05.2011 - 18:25
ADIresiduos

Written by Guib on 26.05.2011 at 06:07

Written by ADIresiduos on 26.05.2011 at 01:20

Agree! But now a days is quite easy to get an idea of how a band sounds like: you tube, metal radio, etc.; and whenever a friend of yours tells you to catch a certain band because they sound "very heavy, brutal, epic. etc", you can always check it out on the internet (90% positive that you'll find something on it). So, use technology after reading a review and decide for yourself.


Smart... but ya know, if everyone would check every bands and songs (and god knows theres alot of them... fuck god) then what would be the point of good 'ol reviews ? We always like the entertainement of someone expressing his opinion about a subject, especially concerning music. Don't ya think so ?

Yes, I agree with that. Music is entertainment and a music review should also be for that purpose and also to give a hint as to what to expect from a certain band/record. I guess when all of us get interested in a band after reading a review, we will try to get a glimpse of their music before we actually buy the CD. I.e.: Metallica, I've always been a fan, up to the black album. After that, even though I read some good reviews on their following records, when I downloaded them I really got dissapointed and never bought the original ones (I own the originals from Kill 'em All through Metallica (black album... and now Death Magnetic).
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27.09.2011 - 11:06
Milena
gloom cookie
Written by ADIresiduos on 26.05.2011 at 01:20

Agree! But now a days is quite easy to get an idea of how a band sounds like: you tube, metal radio, etc.; and whenever a friend of yours tells you to catch a certain band because they sound "very heavy, brutal, epic. etc", you can always check it out on the internet (90% positive that you'll find something on it). So, use technology after reading a review and decide for yourself.

Never could rely on that. Lets say that, for an example, I get to check out a whole song on youtube, but I don't like the song. I still have to try out the whole album to see if it's crap, which consumes 45 mins to 1 hour. What if it's a bad album? Then I suspect that just might be one low point in the band's career. So what do I do then, listen to their whole discography on youtube? That way is very tiring and time-consuming, obviously. In fact (I suppose most of you peeps who are lucky enough to have record stores in their country download your albums before you buy them, for me it's just download), before you waste time and internet-connection to download something, you could try and read about it to see if it will match your taste. That's why I use MS and the reviews on this site. Sure, a third of bands I've found was pretty much not my thing, but I'm finding a lot of bands to my liking.
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11.10.2011 - 12:12
JD
Account deleted
Quote:
(with one hand cupping their balls and another plugging their anus)


Hahahaha
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20.11.2012 - 18:21
Aristarchos

Written by BitterCOld on 21.05.2011 at 20:50

Written by The Norseman on 21.05.2011 at 17:33

I give you an example. I usually listen to power/heavy metal but sometimes I like to try other styles like Black for example. Being a person that don't know much about black metal bands, where do I base myself to pick an album to listen to? The reviews? No, never. I base myself on the ratings an album has, because that is an average grade given by several persons, so the chances of it being more accurate are greater. Reviews, I'll find several reviews saying different things because most people fail to actually give an imparcial note.

This is just my opinion, I respect yours and I'm not looking to change it.




are you kidding me? you take the album scores? those are horribly overinflated by folks who just click a number... if you had any idea how many THOUSANDS of votes i've nuked from users who create accounts just to spam 10s to "cool" artists and 1's to slag off either uncool artists or others topping the charts in direct competition to their favorites.

if you think reviews are impartial why would you expect scores to be any different? just clicking "10" is a lot easier than typing 500 words why something is a 9.8 or whatever.

you hit the nail on the head the prior paragraph. and it holds true with music, movies, books, everything. you are best off finding someone who does reviews with tastes similar to your own.

I think the ratings give a much more fair picture of how good an album is regarded as than a review, as long as you check out that the album has enough ratings. I don't read reviews to see how good the reviewer think it is. I read them for getting a picture of how they sound.
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20.11.2012 - 20:51
BitterCOld
The Ancient One
Written by Aristarchos on 20.11.2012 at 18:21

I think the ratings give a much more fair picture of how good an album is regarded as than an review, as long as you check out that the album has enough ratings. I don't read reviews to see how good the reviewer think it is. I read them for getting a picture of how they sound.


as someone who has had to nuke literally tens of thousands of votes due to fraud, allow me to retort:

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
----
get the fuck off my lawn.

Beer Bug Virus Spotify Playlist crafted by Nikarg and I. Feel free to tune in and add some pertinent metal tunes!
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20.11.2012 - 21:08
X-Ray Rod
Skandino
*spit take*

That's all I have to say about the ratings.
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Written by BloodTears on 19.08.2011 at 18:29
Like you could kiss my ass
Written by Milena on 20.06.2012 at 10:49
Rod, let me love you.
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21.11.2012 - 11:34
Aristarchos

Written by BitterCOld on 20.11.2012 at 20:51

Written by Aristarchos on 20.11.2012 at 18:21

I think the ratings give a much more fair picture of how good an album is regarded as than an review, as long as you check out that the album has enough ratings. I don't read reviews to see how good the reviewer think it is. I read them for getting a picture of how they sound.


as someone who has had to nuke literally tens of thousands of votes due to fraud, allow me to retort:

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Anyway I don't think a rating of a reviewer says more of how good I will find an album than a random vote, since the chances that I will have the same musical taste as the reviewer is almost zero, but a review can help me to get a picture of how an album actually sounds, rather than how good it is, and then on that I could base if it is worth checking out.
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