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You Suck!!


Written by: Herzebeth
Published: May 30, 2008
 


So the culture of "You Suck!" arrived and it's stronger than ever...

I was all happy polishing my nice CD collection, I noticed my lack of a buckethead album so I went to the local record store just to find almost every single album by that fellow is more expensive than a piña colonic, so I bought the following items instead:

Buckethead - Enter The Chicken
The Kooks - Konk
Mogwai - Rock Action
Godspeed You Black Emperor - Slow Riot For New Zero Canada EP

All of a sudden an old guy (you know with geek glasses, short hair an old candlemass shirt and the classic old man fat belly) basically just looking old (he was maybe 40 or so) came to me and said...

Old Dude: So I noticed you are wearing a Carcass shirt, cool band and all, you going' CD huntin' today aren't ya'?

I thought..."uh a friendly geek, what a nice thing..."

Herz: Sort of, I just wanted some Buckethead for my collection and...

Old Dude: *Going Crazy* Buckethead?!?!?!!? what the fuck are you doing wearing a Carcass shirt if you like Buckethead?

Herz: Well uhm...what's the big deal, I'm open minded I guess...

Old Dude: *sees my new CD's* and Mogwai? Dude you suck!

Herz: WTF?!?!





Old Dude: *enters an office while looking really geek and senior*

Turns out the dude was the owner of the fucking store; so it makes me wonder, a dude who's almost 40 years old owns a record shop, he's a metal-head and hates almost everything that doesn't sound classic or old-school...then I figure, why the fuck does he opens a record shop with tons of rock albums and lacks of musical appreciation...to feel better about himself? to buy food for his kids? to earn the right of saying "you suck" to people with non metal albums on their to-buy list?

Are we all elitists? me calling him a Geek doesn't makes me that open-minded neither right? we then have "anti-poser" topics throughout the entire forum, I've seen people throwing bottles at emos and posers in concerts... yes they suck...but why really?

The thing is, maybe that old dude should have been polishing his phonograph while listening to old hippie bands like May Blitz or Iron Butterfly...he decided not to and starts listening to metal to feel less old...good for him, way to go!... but then bashes a helpless little kid (me) for buying things he doesn't like, WTF?

why the hell do most people wants to feel more like a connoiseur by telling other people "they suck"???

In the end there will be always someone more clever than you, more experienced than you, with ten times more CD's than you and so on...still we see someone with less stuff and we obviously take the chance and inmediately say "You Suck"!!!! it feels so warm and nice...but it's fucking wrong...right?...right? come on I KNOW YOU'VE USED THIS PHRASE MORE THAN ONCE!!!

so anyway, this was my nice experience this day, if you didn't like it just read the title again





Comments page 3 / 3

Comments: 64   Visited by: 352 users
30.11.2013 - 18:03
Marcel Hubregtse
Grumpy Old Fuck
Elite
Written by Boxcar Willy on 30.11.2013 at 17:23

I can't believe this article is over 5 years old and no one has made a joke that marcel is the shop owner.

Then you clearly haven't read the comments on the first page.
----
Member of the true crusade against European Flower Metal

Yesterday is dead and gone, tomorrow is out of sight
Dawn Crosby (r.i.p.)
05.04.1963 - 15.12.1996

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01.12.2013 - 21:24
Mattybu
Just reading this know I can't believe he didn't drop the gloves with the store owner right there.... talking about B like that gets you a smacking where I'm from!!!
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02.12.2013 - 02:59
Lit.
Account deleted
Gives you a stern talking to where I'm from.

Well, so much for fat people being jolly.
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18.04.2024 - 05:56
F3ynman
Nocturnal Bro
Contributor
Petition to bring back these types of short, anecdotal, and funny articles!
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