Starvynth i c deaf people StaffPosts: 3185 |
Now that's what I call a courageous review!
There are 1,250 fans of Emperor on this site so rest assured to receive lots of peace, love and understanding from their side.
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signatures = SPAM
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BlackMetalDay
Posts: 95
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26.03.2019 - 19:15Rating: 9
You sure have original tastes according to your votes. Now I'm waiting for reviews of Opeth - Blackwater Park (rated 1) or Dream Theater - Images and Words (rated 1), two other awful pieces of music as everybody knows... just kidding, don't bother, except if you have pleasure doing this :
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BlackMetalDay
Posts: 95
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26.03.2019 - 19:19Rating: 9
Little contradiction detected, you say "The most annoying bands play this type of genre (Dimmu Borgir (...)" yet you rated their new album Aeons 8/10.
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RaduP CertifiedHipster StaffPosts: 9058 |
RaduPCertifiedHipsterStaffPosts: 9058
Wew lad
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Do you think if the heart keeps on shrinking
One day there will be no heart at all?
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Harmaajoki
Posts: 92 |
27.03.2019 - 04:45Rating: 10
Reading this guy's review becoming my new depression treatment
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Shit talking and shit taste, whatever.
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Nefarious Doom Knight StaffPosts: 5548 |
27.03.2019 - 06:49Rating: 8
The troll is strong in this one
I especially loved this bit:
"If you love yourself and are a normal lad, quit listening to this album after the first minute of "Alsvartr (The Oath)" and end all relations with people who claim that this album is worth a rating of anything more than 1/10. "
...proceeds to score the album 2/10
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"FUCK!!! You're the fucking 5th person asking me in an interview about the woman in the bathtub?The problem is that I AM the fucking person in the bathtub, and I AM a fucking MAN, for fuck's sake! I hate you all!" ~ Herr Morbid
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Bad English Tage Westerlund
Posts: 62135 |
Epic reviev in old school style, non writes those herr anymore.
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I stand whit Ukraine and Israel. They have right to defend own citizens.
Stormtroopers of Death - "Speak English or Die"
I better die, because I never will learn speek english, so I choose dieing
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Cynic Metalhead Ambrish Saxena
Posts: 7595 |
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RaduP CertifiedHipster StaffPosts: 9058 |
RaduPCertifiedHipsterStaffPosts: 9058
Please review Lulu
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Do you think if the heart keeps on shrinking
One day there will be no heart at all?
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bleak Account deleted |
bleak Account deleted
Jajajajaja... who is this clown? Funny as shit!
Favourite piece of stupidity: "This album is devoid of interesting riffs, barely creates an interesting atmosphere and only excels in the overuse of synths and in giving you migraines."
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Tiago Rocha Dark Lighthouse
Posts: 89 |
27.03.2019 - 17:01Rating: 8
I actually had to check if it was the 1st of April already and this wasn't one of those fake posts MS does on that day.
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Darkside Momo Retired ElitePosts: 9089 |
Written by Cynic Metalhead on 27.03.2019 at 08:04
Ponderer spotted.
I dunno, but there's certainly the same trolling level here
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My Author's Blog (in French)
"You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you"
"I've lost too many years now
I'm stealing back my soul
I am awake"
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Metren Dreadrealm
Posts: 1414 |
27.03.2019 - 21:11Rating: 7
Written by [user id=124808] on 27.03.2019 at 16:31
Jajajajaja... who is this clown? Funny as shit!
Favourite piece of stupidity: "This album is devoid of interesting riffs, barely creates an interesting atmosphere and only excels in the overuse of synths and in giving you migraines."
Put me into the shallow contrarian list, bc I actually kind of agree that the album lacks an atmosphere (especially when compared to Nightside Eclipse). I think Anthems is massively overrated.
The review is hilarious, however.
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EloZ
Posts: 77 |
27.03.2019 - 21:17Rating: 9
The review is based on personal opinion and a little too drastic. Anyway, I consider Emperor a great band for only one reason: In the nightside eclipse. The rest is not even close to this great marterpiece of black metal. Anthems I personally don't like. I save the glacial atmosphere that Emperor's albums always have, but there is some lack of ideas and inspiration. All the inspiration is concentrated on the previous album. But is my opinion and everybody is free to disagree and think otherwise.
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WarMaster
Posts: 18 |
WOW, I want what ever he smoked/drank while writing this critique...damn
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Enissa
Posts: 816 |
Oh come on.. Not Carach...
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Drekavaц Account deleted |
Drekavaц Account deleted
Written by RaduP on 27.03.2019 at 09:24
Please review Lulu
He will review with 10/10 :
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John doe
Posts: 5143 |
Written by [user id=183371] on 28.03.2019 at 11:01
Written by RaduP on 27.03.2019 at 09:24
Please review Lulu
He will review with 10/10 :
no, as he dislikes whatever Metallica did after Ride the Lightning
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I thought the two primary purposes for the internet were cat memes and overreactions.
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RaduP CertifiedHipster StaffPosts: 9058 |
RaduPCertifiedHipsterStaffPosts: 9058
Written by [user id=183371] on 28.03.2019 at 11:01
Written by RaduP on 27.03.2019 at 09:24
Please review Lulu
He will review with 10/10 :
I'd be disappointed if he didn't
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Do you think if the heart keeps on shrinking
One day there will be no heart at all?
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
Written by BlackMetalDay on 26.03.2019 at 19:19
Little contradiction detected, you say "The most annoying bands play this type of genre (Dimmu Borgir (...)" yet you rated their new album Aeons 8/10.
I like Aeon because the Black metal elements have almost been completely wiped off. It's simply a catchy pop album and a representation of the true talent that Shagrath and co possess unlike their earlier material where they were way out of their depth. I totally dislike everything else before Aeon.
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
Written by Nefarious on 27.03.2019 at 06:49
The troll is strong in this one
I especially loved this bit:
"If you love yourself and are a normal lad, quit listening to this album after the first minute of "Alsvartr (The Oath)" and end all relations with people who claim that this album is worth a rating of anything more than 1/10. "
...proceeds to score the album 2/10
unfortunately the powers that be are too scared to allow a reviewer to rate and album with a 0 or 1. 2 is the lowest possible score.
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
Written by Bad English on 27.03.2019 at 06:51
Epic reviev in old school style, non writes those herr anymore.
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
Written by [user id=124808] on 27.03.2019 at 16:31
Jajajajaja... who is this clown? Funny as shit!
Favourite piece of stupidity: "This album is devoid of interesting riffs, barely creates an interesting atmosphere and only excels in the overuse of synths and in giving you migraines."
This review is only meant for normal lads with 2 ears. Those with 16 ears can find it in themselves to enjoy this wall of noise.
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
Written by Enissa on 28.03.2019 at 08:57
Oh come on.. Not Carach...
I was unable to complete Where Corpses Sink Forever; perhaps one day I shall persevere to the end and write up a review on how annoying the band is.
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
Written by John doe on 28.03.2019 at 11:12
Written by [user id=183371] on 28.03.2019 at 11:01
Written by RaduP on 27.03.2019 at 09:24
Please review Lulu
He will review with 10/10 :
no, as he dislikes whatever Metallica did after Ride the Lightning
Yea, Metallica died with RtL. Reviewing Lulu is a total waste of time unless I am allowed to score it a 0 and simply write Lol Bitch! as the review.
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
Written by WarMaster on 28.03.2019 at 01:36
WOW, I want what ever he smoked/drank while writing this critique...damn
All is takes is listening to this album and you will get there.
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
Written by BlackMetalDay on 26.03.2019 at 19:15
You sure have original tastes according to your votes. Now I'm waiting for reviews of Opeth - Blackwater Park (rated 1) or Dream Theater - Images and Words (rated 1), two other awful pieces of music as everybody knows... just kidding, don't bother, except if you have pleasure doing this :
Meh, I can only review what is ahead of me. If i somehow decide to relisten to those pieces of garbage to find out how much they suck, then yeah, I shall drop a review.
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Maasai Mara
Posts: 159 |
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You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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Daniell _爱情_ ElitePosts: 6107 |
02.04.2019 - 14:29Rating: 9
You just couldn't stay away, could you?
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Rulatore
Posts: 1108 |
Everybody making fun of the review, but I wholeheartedly agree with this statement here
Quote: The sound mixing in this album is very poor and not in the cool atmospheric way
I'll give him the benefit of the doubt cause I absolutely can't stand the production here, is one of the worst out there for such a loved album and makes me think that there's a bit of truth in what he says (that is cool to like this album). I dont see a complain about the songwriting in particular, so I can see where he's coming from.
Hearing the songs from this album played live (the double live album) really shows how much potential this record have, but that shitty production really makes it hard to appreciate the songwriting here
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