Reverend Bizarre - In The Rectory Of The Bizarre Reverend review
| Band: | Reverend Bizarre |
| Album: | In The Rectory Of The Bizarre Reverend |
| Style: | Doom metal |
| Release date: | 2002 |
| Guest review by: | Maasai Mara |
01. Burn In Hell!
02. In The Rectory
03. The Hour Of Death
04. Sodoma Sunrise
05. Doomsower
06. Cirith Ungol
Christians are usually obsessed with when the world will end and some even claim that there are already signs showing that this is the end of days. Thinking about the apocalypse and the second coming of Christ had me stuck in 6 months of deep thought as to what album would best represent the end of days and could serve as a soundtrack to the apocalypse. Ladies and gentlemen, In The Rectory Of The Bizarre Reverend is the perfect soundtrack to the end of days. I can now safely join Christian eschatological discussions and point to this album as the harbinger of the second coming of Christ. I am actually surprised that Christ has resisted coming 17 years after this soundtrack to His second coming was released.
This album is not just a piece of art but a deep sermon from men sent by Yahweh Himself to warn the sinners of the impending doom and hellish fires that they risk. In fact, the three men behind this album represent the Trinity itself: Albert Witchfinder is God the Father, providing order and leadership through his mournful, meaty, and menacing bass rhythms. His proselytizing vocals in this album can convert even the most militant of atheists and is arguably the best traditional doom delivery, perhaps rivaled only by Wino on Born Too Late. Peter Vicar is God the Son with his accompanying riffs and the Earl of Void is God the Spirit, uplifting your spirit with his slow-timed drumming, which will force you to speak in tongues like any good Christian.
As a fan of traditional doom metal, I often wondered what a combination of the epicness of Candlemass, the mournful cries of Saint Vitus, and the spirit of Pentagram would sound like. Reverend Bizarre manage to perfectly blend in those qualities and slap our souls with this masterpiece.
"Burn In Hell" serves as the perfect introduction to this doomsday soundtrack, full of haunting riffs and Witchfinder's demonic vocals. The ending where he yells "you bastard" is the most haunting thing I have ever heard. Reverend Bizarre truly demonstrate that they are not just a simple, one-trick, slow-paced pony on "In The Rectory," where they up the pace and kick your teeth in with fast-paced, almost thrashy riffs for about 2 minutes before descending into the preachy, slow, soul-burning doom that we all love, which is repeated in "Sodoma Sunrise".
The rest of the album is in the same vein of soul-crushing riffs and Witchfinder delivering his sermon in the most convincing manner. Talking about the riffs and delivery of this album is a waste of time since this is a spiritual journey best experienced just before Christ descends from the clouds or when you are on your deathbed.
This album is simply the best traditional doom album to ever be released and if you are yet to listen to this album or rate it less than a 9; I HOPE YOU BURN IN HELL, YOU BASTARD!
Rating breakdown
| Performance: | 10 |
| Songwriting: | 10 |
| Originality: | 9 |
| Production: | 9 |
Written by Maasai Mara | 06.07.2019
Guest review disclaimer:
This is a guest review, which means it does not necessarily represent the point of view of the MS Staff.
This is a guest review, which means it does not necessarily represent the point of view of the MS Staff.
Comments
Comments: 9
Visited by: 50 users
| Bad English Tage Westerlund Posts: 62283  |
End of the world, zoom over the world, i like This band, amazing doom
---- I stand whit Ukraine and Israel. They have right to defend own citizens. Stormtroopers of Death - "Speak English or Die"  I better die, because I never will learn speek english, so I choose dieing
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| Troy Killjoy perfunctionist Staff Posts: 21306  |
Sooo, do you like this album or...? Not really getting a good sense of your opinion here.
---- "Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something."
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| Daniell _爱情_ Elite Posts: 6120  |
The first two paragraphs make me wonder: you must be either a troll, or a religious nut. Judging by the use of capital letters, I'll go with the nut. The overall tone of the whole thing seems to support my suspicions. "Soul-crushing", "demonic", "haunting", "mournful". The only word from The Doom Cliche Playbook that you missed is "excruciating". But you managed to use the word "pace" three times in one sentence instead.
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| Starvynth i c deaf people Staff Posts: 3248  |
Naah, I believe you are a tad too harsh on the reviewer. The clichés of doom are real and there's nothing wrong playing with them. And quite frankly, I didn't think for a second I was reading the words of a religious nut but rather following a false priest's homily, entirely in line with the Reverend's bizarre image: tongue-in-cheek religiousness and consciously exaggerated godliness but hypocritical and blasphemous at heart.
---- signatures = SPAM
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| Maasai Mara Posts: 159  |
Written by Troy Killjoy on 20.09.2019 at 06:58 Of course i do not like it and that is why i have given it a rating of 9.9/10.
---- You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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| Maasai Mara Posts: 159 |
Quote:Written by Daniell on 20.09.2019 at 09:42 Bravo captain obvious, you have managed to notice some life shattering discovery right there. Next time i will will use pace about 7 times in a sentence since 7 is the other number of Yahweh besides 3.
---- You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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| Maasai Mara Posts: 159 |
Written by Starvynth on 21.09.2019 at 00:02 Amen brother in Christ. Good to see another christian who understands the gospel of Reverend Bizarre, may Yahweh protect us from ignorant sinners like Daniell, no wonder he was thrown into the lion's den by King Nebuchadnezzar.
---- You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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| nikarg Staff Posts: 7508  |
I quite like this review, it's got a sense of humour and describes the album well. Not that it needs to be described really, if you don't already know and love In The Rectory Of The Bizarre Reverend -or any album by Reverend Bizarre for that matter- you will surely burn in hell 
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| Maasai Mara Posts: 159 |
Written by nikarg on 30.09.2019 at 14:46 Amen.
---- You are not metal enough until you visit Kenya. The cradle of mankind, where man learnt first to work with stones and first enjoyed the sounds produced by banging stones which later influenced metal in all its sounds and genres.
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