You shall die so many times before you perish

Surrounded by living, self indulging mirrors
digesting temptation's stolen fruit
moving on self-fulfilled circles
personality hanged on a rope called capitalism
organism breathing a life of false ecstasy

You shall die so many times before you perish
consuming the fruits of ill virtue

Personifying the sickening nature of man's lechery
lusting society's forbidden fruit
loving in uncaring detachment
creativity sacrificed to a world of conventions
hedonism existing in a maelstorm of lies

A dream become a creed, a want become a need
a serenade for the tragic
a lover self confessed, a circle truly blessed
emotional hegemony

Sanity on a shoestring, a tripwire tragedy
oscillation between extremes
of agonizing sumblimity and sublime agony

Skirting reality with holistic perceptions
absorbtion of truths
wanted as evidence and evidently unwanted

An unprotected sensitivity, a capacity to drink poisons
gladly court oblivion
by loving with death and dying to love

Desires pursued to their bloody ends
and compulsive denial
of unpopular possibilities and unasked for reality

I'm seeing the parts in me
that which I hate to see
suffer the shadows
suffer the shadows

The child inside weep for my life
for such bitter twisted dreams
the fool by her side could never see lies
any economy of truth he believed

Blind to compassion
I shall suffer the shadows in my past
depressed and saddened
I shall pay my debt to nature

The mother inside feels my sadness and pain
in this growing pool of desire
the father by her side could never have cared
cold blooded he lived as a liar

Severed from unearthly mythomania
I lay to rest te ghosts of past seductions
leaving false paradises unfathered
I sing swan songs for stability

No quarter for facade, falsity shall go the way of all flesh
the way of all flesh, of all flesh

Desiring life from my emotional mortality
I lick the wounds of sexual openings
becoming spiritual and libidinal
I breathe life into this union taking flesh

At one with the clean breasts of sensory delight
I endear myself to this mutual growth
leaving feelings of restraint unmothered
I plunge into meta-sensivity

Pistols at dawn for my pseudo sanity
I filt unfettered through an erotic fantasy
becoming luminous and emotive
I understand all seven heavens

Utterance of a word to give form
to give being all
corrupted by aeons of interpretation
misinterpretation of all

No longer a path back to that which once was
now a suicidal game of chinese whispers of god

The word mutated: a phrase of fallacy
the phrase a law that rules our lives: insanity

Assimilate myriad delusions
seek the whispered word
behind the roars of ingorance

Seek the path back to that which once was
no more futile fumblings for a misunderstood god

He that lives in hope, dances to all ill tune
for wantonness knows no law
and corporations have neither bodies to be punished
nor souls to be damned
the road to oblivion is paved with good intentions
and work incentives

In the world of the blind
the one eyed man makes corporations
corporations leaving sickness
which can't be cured which must be endured

One funeral brings many in civilised society
a society soon ripe, soon rotten

A guilty conscience needs no accuser
but silence is mistaken for consent and to erris human
drive out nature with a pitchfork and she'll neither come back
nor breathe for us again
the road of oblivion is paved with good intentions
and momentary lapses of reason

Internal descent down every ladder in existence
lie naked with the dragon-no interest in resistance
to give myself vision where I was blind
I trip the trigger and detonate my mind

Fragmented memories and kaleidoscopic visions
reality is mutable and open to revision
seek the supersonic become one with all
immerse myself in the ocean of my soul

Gather the shattered remains of thoughts
thought mattered
redefine my world
debris is scattered, a fleeting glimse of the hereafter
liberates any soul

Lost in myself, alone I stand
searching for a death of moments
divine and mundane reconciled. I live

The world realigns and begins to take form
breathless and weak yet alive, reborn
experiment or experience? Rejoice or regret?
Only one way to know as I take my first steps

Picture a man with his life in his hands
consumed by the death of his dreams
clutching at straws he dreams no more
a desolate figure, I am he
my agony fuelled by the shadows I ruled
I hide from the world in the dark
outwardly sane, I conceal my pain
life's touch cold steel in my heart

Wanting fearing facing life alone
I'm not hearing your reasons, so leave me alone

I'm on the brink of insanity, I think
consumed by flames of desire
the two-faced divinity a victim of tragedy
the flames now its funeral pyre
but the death still walks and the divinity talks
I'm facing it day by day
each glimse a hell I've come to know so well
see the idealist pay

Assaulted by the day, my inner world's grey-desolation
I'll take what I can though I hate what I am-abomination
alcoholic retreat instead of facing defeat-rejection
narcotic escape before it's too late-deception

I've invested my soul in achieving this goal
made pacts sworn oaths taken vows
I never realized each pact has two sides
what hope for my soul now?
we're both still here, one light one dark
though the cyclone now lies dead
so let's both dream of things we won't see
of worlds that will never be said