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Worst names for metal bands



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Original post

Posted by Kennoth, 22.05.2010 - 00:19
So, I was browsing one day through Last.fm, and I find this underground black metal act called Darkened Nocturn Slaughtercult, and I coulnd't help but to wonder how on EARTH do you come up with something so lame and wannabe cvlt. I mean seriously... I don't really care if their music is good (and since I hate black metal, for me probably not).

So, got any similar ones to share? Remember, we're talking about lame, stupid names, not how good or bad their music is.
16.02.2022 - 09:01
no one

There's this nz BM band called Unimpressed
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25.03.2022 - 10:23
We've once ended up with an wierd name, just because we had a first show before we had a cool band name.

Needed something real badass and were not satisfied with anything that came in our minds. Smart as we are, we decided to postpone that decission. Told the promoter to use our bass players nickname on the bill: Action Bass Tom with band

Big mighty mistake: on the posters and flyers it was written in one word Actionbasstomband , the evening went down legendary and afterwards there was no way to get that changed again !

Looking back, I learned to love that name and becoming proud of. But hell, weve ended up with it because we wanted to have a brutal and great one 😆
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25.03.2022 - 11:15
F3ynman2000
Nocturnal Bro
Written by GreatPretender on 25.03.2022 at 10:23

We've once ended up with an wierd name, just because we had a first show before we had a cool band name.

Needed something real badass and were not satisfied with anything that came in our minds. Smart as we are, we decided to postpone that decission. Told the promoter to use our bass players nickname on the bill: Action Bass Tom with band

Big mighty mistake: on the posters and flyers it was written in one word Actionbasstomband , the evening went down legendary and afterwards there was no way to get that changed again !

Looking back, I learned to love that name and becoming proud of. But hell, weve ended up with it because we wanted to have a brutal and great one 😆

Funny story, thanks for sharing
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19.04.2022 - 23:34
Metal Health

I always thought Black Metal band Lifelover was a silly name, although amusingly ironic. As well as that, Pig Destroyer, Anal C*nt, Goatwhore, Archgoat, anything with goat in their name is pretty laughable.
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20.04.2022 - 05:39
no one

Written by Metal Health on 19.04.2022 at 23:34

I always thought Black Metal band Lifelover was a silly name, although amusingly ironic. As well as that, Pig Destroyer, Anal C*nt, Goatwhore, Archgoat, anything with goat in their name is pretty laughable.

I love the name lifelover for a depressive band, probably one of the best dsbm band names out there imo
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20.04.2022 - 10:31
IronAngel

Generally, I dislike names that are phrases. A band name is supposed to be a collective name for the group, so it needs to be snappy and preferrably look like a name. If you can put "the" in front, that's usually a good sign. The Supremes, the Ronettes, the Beach Boys, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds. Or it can be a singular name, Portishead (name of a town but has come to connote just themselves), Judas Priest (makes no sense and is ungrammatical, but feels good in the mouth and is simultaneously liturgical and blasphemous), Reverend Bizarre, etc.

I don't mind ridiculous names. For me, Deströyer 666 is much better than Every Time I Die. One is a name, the other is a random phrase. (Of-structures I have no problem with, that's a solid way to name a thing, but often they get too long.)

Granted, sometimes a silly name can transcend its literal meaning (if it even has one) and become associated with nothing but the band. Godspeed You! Black Emperor is that kind of name. (I would also put We Butter the Bread with Butter in the iconic category, if they were remotely interesting.) It's also a matter of genre expectations: if it's post-rock, you can probably get away with it. I guess a name is good/memorable if it primarily evokes the band itself, and not too much else.

Of course, the reason many bands have to resort to convoluted names is because all the simple and effective nouns have already been taken. Death, Sleep, Slayer, Anathema, Emperor, Earth.

But good bands with bad names? My Dying Bride. While Heaven Wept (although I have to give it to them, the shape and alliteration is good). Today is the Day. SubRosa (I hate that capitalisation).
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27.04.2022 - 18:49
Bad English
Tage Westerlund
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Life is to short for LOVE, there is many great things to do online !!!

Stormtroopers of Death - ''Speak English or Die''
apos;'
[image]
I better die, because I never will learn speek english, so I choose dieing
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27.04.2022 - 19:29
Karlabos
Meat and Potatos
Written by Bad English on 27.04.2022 at 18:49

Λοπαδοτεμαχοσελαχογαλεο Κρανιολειψανοδριμυποτριμματο Σιλφιοκαραβομελιτοκατακεχυμενο Κιχλεπικοσσυφοφαττο Περιστεραλεκτρυονοπτοκεφαλλιο Κιγκλοπελειολαγῳοσιραιο Βαφητραγανοπτερύγων

Oh... That's that food name! I remember that word from the biggest words in the world, when I learned it as a kid...
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- Reimu Hakurei
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12.05.2022 - 17:24
Metal Rasputin

I wouldn't call this one the worst ever, but it's pretty silly. Back in the mid 90's there was a Finnish death metal band called Pakeni, the name is derived from "Carcass" which kinda sounds like a Finnish word for "escaped" for which "pakeni" is a synonym.
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12.05.2022 - 20:30
IronAngel

Written by Metal Rasputin on 12.05.2022 at 17:24

I wouldn't call this one the worst ever, but it's pretty silly. Back in the mid 90's there was a Finnish death metal band called Pakeni, the name is derived from "Carcass" which kinda sounds like a Finnish word for "escaped" for which "pakeni" is a synonym.


I didn't know that, but I approve!
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09.11.2022 - 20:36
TheTrueLHC

Limp Bizkit hands down
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22.04.2023 - 17:27
Bad English
Tage Westerlund
XavlegbmaofffassssitimiwoamndutroabcwapwaeiippohfffX

I hope radu and yanv dont see it
----
Life is to short for LOVE, there is many great things to do online !!!

Stormtroopers of Death - ''Speak English or Die''
apos;'
[image]
I better die, because I never will learn speek english, so I choose dieing
Loading...
22.04.2023 - 23:37
Karlabos
Meat and Potatos
Written by Bad English on 22.04.2023 at 17:27

XavlegbmaofffassssitimiwoamndutroabcwapwaeiippohfffX

I hope radu and yanv dont see it

Notice there's also the "full name" (whatever that means) right below on the band's description on this link.
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"Aah! The cat turned into a cat!"
- Reimu Hakurei
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23.04.2023 - 00:16
F3ynman2000
Nocturnal Bro
Written by Bad English on 22.04.2023 at 17:27

XavlegbmaofffassssitimiwoamndutroabcwapwaeiippohfffX

I hope radu and yanv dont see it

That logo too
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