Metal Storm logo
What The Heck I Meant: An Apology...

Written by: Dane Train
Published: 06.04.2012

What The Heck I Meant: An Apology And Clarification Letter To All Who Jumped To Stereotypical Wild Conclusions And Completely Missed The Fact That The Blog Was A Satirical Rant About An April Fools' Day Joke That Never Actually Came To Fruition

For those of you that read my blog I posted on April 1st, 2012 and replied either on the forum boards or to my personal message box all I have to say is...


Not Amused At All

Firstly, let me apologizes to those of you out there that did not find this joke funny at all. The first of April is traditionally a time of lighthearted hoaxes and jokes and as such, Metal Storm tries very hard to provide this to you each year. The joke this year was that Metal Storm became a porn site but you all missed it. My ranting blog was aimed at furthering that notion that it had actually happened. My only intention was to get people laughing.

I guess somewhere along the road the concept that this was all a huge gag was lost.

I would also truly and deeply like to apologize to anyone who thought that the mentality and reactions in the blog were how I really felt. I want to make it public record that the majority of that does not reflect my view.

Still part of me is rather baffled at the notion that many of you did not even get the fact that is was a joke and I am rather shocked at how quickly many of you were began to hurl insults and SPAM my in-box with hate-mail. Please correct me if I am wrong, but for those who attacked me for that blog miss the entire notion of the Metal Storm April Fools' Day joke? Did you actually read my blog closely? There were numerous mentions and references to the Metal Storm pornography, did any of you actually get to see any of this pornography that supposedly upset me?

Plus there was the whole line about the Dora The Explorer Pool...

...add midgets and peanut butter for good times

Come on guys, you had no inkling that this was all a ruse?

But before I actually start ranting, I also need to take a step back, humble myself, and do some re-assessment.

Maybe part of the reason the joke failed is because those who didn't know anything about me just assume that because I am a Christian, I would over react like that. It seems logical to me. Those who do know me seemed to really enjoy it. Not every PM I got was negative, some people thought it was hysterical. Then again, most of them all know me.

The big question is where do we go from here? I am not sure. It is something I have to think and pray about.

And by the way, I think Marcel is a really great man.

Written on 06.04.2012 by Dane hails from Asheville, NC which is Beer City, USA. When he is not drinking various craft and micro brews, Dane fronts the Stoner Doom Metal band, The Quick. He also has a massive collection of Hellboy comic books.

Comments page 2 / 2

Comments: 34   Visited by: 192 users
07.04.2012 - 19:10
Account deleted
Oh teh noes!
07.04.2012 - 22:51
The Ancient One
Written by Guest on 07.04.2012 at 10:50

Yep...I totally missed the whole MS becoming a Porn Site...the thing is, MS is based in Estonia so I always miss it...everything happens later on and I miss all do...

it never did, chief. as was mentioned in this thread, we skipped straight from March 31st to April 2nd, and we wrote the big, obligatory "reveal" that all yesterday's shenanigans were a giant prank without said prank every actually having happened.

people got so caught up in missing the "metalpron" prank they missed the real one.
get the fuck off my lawn.

Beer Bug Virus Spotify Playlist crafted by Nikarg and I. Feel free to tune in and add some pertinent metal tunes!
08.04.2012 - 04:28
Account deleted
Looks like the Dane Train...
...Is back on track.

14.04.2012 - 06:58
Boxcar Willy
yr a kook
Written by Doc G. on 07.04.2012 at 00:01

Clean the sand out of your vagina and get over it.

I think I have my new siggy
14:22 - Marcel Hubregtse
I do your mum

Hits total: 7579 | This month: 17