1st of April Britney Spears - Blackout review
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1st of April Britney Spears - Blackout review
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8.8 | 31 votes |
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Blackout! Already the title is perfectly fitting, of course, resembling Britney Spears wonderfully aesthetic new hairs and at the same time how she wants to get out of the media attention, how she wants the reporters to have a blackout whereever she and her private life are concerned, so she can finally concentrate on what she does best. Music. Like always the songwriting is flawless, unfortunately she doesn't write her songs herself, but that doesnt stop them from being catchy, enjoyable to listen to and awfully sexy. Generally this album is really sexy. After having two children she dropped her virgin image. I mean, it wouldn't really make sense to have a virgin image and be a mother at the same time. If it would then the whole bullshit story of virgin Mary could be true as well, and guys, our site is too grim for that, so we won't even start getting into that nonsense. Anyway, this album just has the hottest lyrics to masturbate to late at night, just read this if you don't believe me: "Baby I'm just hot for taking, don't you wanna see my body naked?" from the song 'Perfect Lover' or "It sure will freak you out, Imagine if I work it out, If I get you on top, You're gonna lose your mind" from 'Get Naked'. I don't think any real man out there can argue with me that these lyrics arent totally HOT. Just imagine her belly dancing and her frostbitten erotic black hair. There's nothing in the world that i want to do more than sodomize her haircut, the writing of this draws all the blood into my eternal frost spire. If you don't believe me just look at the video for 'Piece Of Me' here! I don't think you can find me a sexier belly in the entire world of music, except if you're a homo, then you might think male bellies are more erotic, then again, what are you doing on a metal site if you're gay?. Except for Halford, he's an exception of course. Apart from her amazing stomach some of her clothes and backgrounds seem to be made by the master H.R. Giger himself. In terms of videos many a black metal band could learn something from her. I can't wait till the day Spears will make a video with a BM band like Cradle Of Filth or Dimmu Borgir. I swear to satan that it'll be better than any porn movie! Musically I'd say she has evolved from Mickey Mouse electro-pop to black-influenced industrial pop music. A huge step forward to joining the brilliance of metal gods like Marilyn Manson and Slipknot, she's not quite there yet, her visagist still has to work something out, but take my word on it that one day she'll be up there with them. I also think that it should be taken into account that she's having a horrible time at the moment, which makes it even more astonishing that she managed to make a masterpiece like this. I love you Britney! PS: it's a shame that the production is too clean though, it ruins the atmosphere a bit. Performance: 10 Songwriting: 9 Originality: 8 Production: 5 Rating: 8.9 |
Comments
Comments: 120
Visited by: 800 users
| Bad English Tage Westerlund Posts: 62004  |
 this gonna stay after 1th april to?
---- I stand whit Ukraine and Israel. They have right to defend own citizens. Stormtroopers of Death - "Speak English or Die"  I better die, because I never will learn speek english, so I choose dieing
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| Spyroid Rosetta Stoned Posts: 1023  |
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| Doc G. Full Grown Hoser Staff Posts: 9718  |
Lol "The rating is too high. She was hotter as a blonde"
---- "I got a lot of really good ideas, problem is, most of them suck." - George Carlin
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| Bas Retired Staff Elite Posts: 5591  |
Written by Doc G. on 01.04.2008 at 00:34 oh no... she TOTALLY wasn't just look at her pics... damn i want to sodomize that hair, it's so fucking erotic, the way they seem to be staring at me every time i look at them, the way they shine ...i can't stop drooling
---- BAS - Beautifully Accented Sexiness
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| Ernis 狼獾 Posts: 6815  |
Hell yeah! The video "Gimme More" was so tr00 cvult unholy and necro....true Varg Vikernes style!
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| Taktsekte Your Ad Here! Posts: 2808  |
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| BitterCOld The Ancient One Admin Posts: 15287  |
brit pulls off the "bald is sexy" look so much better than, say Galdar!  I would so impale her gates of attrition with my clouded frost spire! Perfect Lover Ist KRieg!
---- get the fuck off my lawn. Beer Bug Virus Spotify Playlist crafted by Nikarg and I. Feel free to tune in and add some pertinent metal tunes!
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| Thryce Retired Staff Elite Posts: 4346  |
Luv this Daughter Of Nothern Darkness, or die in sodomizing untrueness!!!
---- Your favorite band sucks.
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| ScabbeD'~ Posts: 39  |
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| Stalker Lone wanderer Posts: 2705  |
haahhha damn, one of the funniest things ive read lately hahah
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| Dinko Metalac Posts: 11 |
"PS: it's a shame that the production is too clean though, it ruins the atmosphere a bit." Yeah, it lacks some distorsion and tremolo   P.S. I wish you all a fun time on this day
---- Thrash Til Death m/
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| SlaytallicA Lycanthropy Posts: 1261  |
Remind me not to hear this album! 
---- One Pound Of Flesh, No More No Less, No Cartilage, No Bones, But Only Flesh...
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| Arian Totalis The Philosopher Posts: 3351  |
Fuckin Metal   But seriously, why the hell is this album on this site? Is this another april fools joke?
---- "For the Coward there is no Life For the hero there is No Death" -Kakita Toshimoko "The Philosopher, you know so much about nothing at all." _Chuck Schuldiner.
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| Talvi Posts: 825  |
I have a question for ya: Did you actually listened to the album?
---- My account on other musical pages: http://www.last.fm/user/Pozito/ http://rateyourmusic.com/~Talvi
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| Paradox0 Unasuming Madnes Posts: 592 |
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| selken Irreligious Posts: 949  |
Written by Ernis on 01.04.2008 at 00:36 yeah, the dark atmosphere and the blue background of the video reminds me to the frost enviroment similar to Storm of the Light's Bane, I think Blackout is actually the comeback album for BS, its gonna to become a seminal album in the true and kült world of pop. BTW: I think she should kill Christina Aguilera, just to follow the tradition xD xD xD xD xD xD xD xD xD
---- 
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| xdissectionx Posts: 29  |
i disagree with this review. i think it pulled off a 9.2 or 9.3 easily.
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| BitterCOld The Ancient One Admin Posts: 15287 |
Written by Arian Totalis on 01.04.2008 at 02:06 well, it's about the true necro spirit she embodies. the later releases of Ulver and Burzum were not metal albums, but they carried that spirit with them into other venues. Britney clearly does likewise. She truly embodies all seven of the deadly sins... lust - she is currently screwing anything and anyone that moves. and how many teenage boys had their first 'experience' alone and watching one of her vids or that clip of her sucking face with Madonna? (also quite the grim and frostbitten hellbitch considering her name alone is a mockery of the Virgin Mary) i think she nailed me while i was typing this up, ffs! gluttony - she puts away enough deep fried food each day to feed Sub-Saharan Africa for a week greed - when not gobbling men or french fries, she is out spending her millions on clothes for herself. does nothing to benefit society as a whole. sloth - when not shopping, she lays around in a drug and alcohol induced stupor. wrath - Britney ist KRIEG! she blatantly runs over photographers or attacks them with her umbrella... ok, so it's not exactly mjolnir, but it is her weapon of choice. envy - still craves public spotlight, jealous of others, pride - continues to give the flying middle finger salute to the rest of the RIAA by releasing this kvlt new album and zombie sleep walking through eMpTy Vee award appearances even though her career is more deceased than if you took the remains of Dead and Euronymous, soaked them with gasoline, interred them in a church and set fire to the entire thing, burning it to the ground. what is more necro than her career? even right now, she is probably listening to Black(metal)Out in a vodka and red bull induced stupor while stuffing donuts into her mouth while some guy is stuffing her backside, pausing from her munching only to periodically yell "HAIL SATAM, Y'ALL!!! none more black.
---- get the fuck off my lawn. Beer Bug Virus Spotify Playlist crafted by Nikarg and I. Feel free to tune in and add some pertinent metal tunes!
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| Uirapuru Liver Failure Posts: 2955  |
uauhahuahuahua that's just hilarious. i almost die laughing I knew something was wrong (was intriged  ), take me a little time to remember april 1st.
----  ---- member of the true crusade against old school heavy metal, early 80s thrash, NWOBHM, traditional doom, first and second wave black metal, old school death metal, US power metal, 70s prog rock and atmospheric doomsludgestoner. o/
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| iaberis Advice Troll Posts: 1698  |
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| Judas The Amputator Posts: 2043  |
It aer better how ohter rewiew on MS. Werry funny liek milan ultras get cvoerd in krv (slawic werd blud) wen coem to Hellas. Birntey ist mroe hot how ohter gurlz in metall seen.  Wy not mroe reweiew her ablum?  MS Staff, you guys have outdone yourselves this time!
---- "Once the game is over, the king and the pawn both go back into the same box."
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| +{Jonas}+ I R Serious Cat Posts: 4955  |
Priceless!!!
---- "Nobody wants to be the weird kid, you just end up being the weird kid. You don't know how you ended up getting there" - Rob Zombie http://jonas-bs.deviantart.com My dA, mainly photography, go check it out!
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| Arian Totalis The Philosopher Posts: 3351 |
Written by Judas on 01.04.2008 at 04:23 You and Judas switched user names.....XD priceless
---- "For the Coward there is no Life For the hero there is No Death" -Kakita Toshimoko "The Philosopher, you know so much about nothing at all." _Chuck Schuldiner.
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| Elijah Dance, bitch! Posts: 2925  |
There's nothing in the world that i want to do more than sodomize her haircut, the writing of this draws all the blood into my eternal frost spire. Nice 101 Rules of Black Metal reference.
----
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| Mother_North Posts: 128  |
Written by selken on 01.04.2008 at 02:32 LOL that would be so fuckin' evil necro grimm  and she could marry Varg after he gets out of jail  I am laughing myself to death
---- "i still can't imagine any of them dead. They live on; they are fixed on that far-off region called childhood, were nothing ever dies, not even oneself."
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| wildchild Warchild Posts: 4650  |
Britney Spears now that is a black metal name. SPEARS OF HELL YAY!
---- warchildpost.blogspot.com
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| Syk myspace/bonerama Posts: 1504  |
Written by selken on 01.04.2008 at 02:32 +1 fuckin' genius, I would LOVE to see that! Excellent idea to review Britney. The sad thing is, I have to ask: Did Bas make up the song titles or are those things real?
---- death ? thrash ? death/doom/prog ? Hail Zoldon! he's not the kind you have to [url=../bands/album.php?album_id=28982]wind up[/url] on Sundays
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| Raiden Down Under Staff Elite Posts: 8292  |
Written by BitterCOld on 01.04.2008 at 00:40 Britney Ist (getting impaled by) Kraig!
---- "Scream for me Melbourne!!!!" - Bruce Dickinson "I don't see any god up here" - Yuri Gagarin (while in orbit, 1961)
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| Herzebeth Posts: 5537  |
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| bluemobiusx Account deleted |
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