Written by AnGina-- on 18.09.2006 at 21:47

I would really like to thank deeply to @Collacteral and @Frostling. It means so much to me that actually someone takes time to read what I have written and I always love to hear what people imagine and understand beyond my words. I'll be posting some more, but My Monster is my first collection of poems that is growing really slowly and each poem goes though many stages. Thank you again to both of you, your words are most inspiring.

i like your poems too, thay are such unigue and talandetd and deep, but sorry i cant coment them, i only enjoy reading hem

I can not think title of this

Black emotions and sorrowfull dreams
gathered around me when I sleep
Amtyness and dark day clouds
take my tears inn ocean deep

Under silant rain
i cry my past tears
and drowing sorrows whit my hands

Under silant rain
I die of you
and whispered my freinds

Open and swallow
your life
Open and see sorrow
in your life
Open and follow
to your life
in silant tomb

Widow in black painting life
under sillant floor of gray emotions
and teras who taste like wine
crying she silantly

The Malediction Of Veracity

Mechanized into a religious device,
at an age where we were naïve,
defenseless and could barely verbalize for ourselves.
speared with the premise of God into our intellect,
enslaved into the sepulcher of the 10 commandments
and hang by our necks with the golden chain,
baptized, 'The freedom to choose'.
trained to march the bridge from life to death,
paved by the translucent hands of the initiator.
We have to conduct ourselves as slaves to our fetal bearers and protectors.
We can't subsist as we crave, we are stitched with nylon rules,
and authoritative mechanical arms pierced into our fleshy tissues;
bleeding with rebellious venom.

The black sheep

look under your feet
it is changing all the time
did not you see it?
Flying above our heads?

Today it is going to kill us,
the power that is
tomorrow we are going to scream
and pray for heaven and hell

Look under your feet
cannot you see we are falling?
did not you see it,
grabbing for our hands?

Tomorrow we are going to scream
and pray for heaven in hell
we did not know that murder will happen
I just wanted some fun

Look under your feet
we are near the burning rocks
you can already smell the smoke
of your screaming sister death

Yesterday we played hide and seek
we could not know it was wrong!
We wanted only to find them
oh, I should not take the gun!

Look under your feet
oh, too late, you are dead!
I am glad that you took sacrifice
for me and my sins

Thanks to those who have commented. I'm sorry that I haven't commented in some time, but I think it is time to give it another go.

@Kariasakis7...untitled...
when I read your poem I got images of a funeral. the rain, the sorrrowful widow and the coffin that silently is sinking underground. for me this poem reflects the thoughts of this greiving widow. Beautiful in a way. I have to say something about the fourth stanza. I really like this stanza, infact it's my favorite part of this poem. However, you should really try to change the last line:

"Open and swallow
your life
Open and see sorrow
in your life
Open and follow
to your life
in silent tomb"

Do you see how the rythm gets desturbed beacuse you don't rhyme in the last sentence? It could have worked if you didn't rhyme in the first parts. Either you rephrase the stanza or you find a another word in the last sentence. Perhaps "morrow" would be a good word? Either then that, I really enjoyed it, very beautiful.

@Synn:...The Malediction Of Veracity...
Though I don't agree with your point, I can't ignore that the poem is wellwritten. It's well chosed words and despite the rather robust lineage, you have a rythm in it. This poem would work perfect as lyrics to some more aggresive parts of metal, like for exempel black and death metal. Keep writing!

@Vrana...The black sheep...
This poem has a dark undertone. For me, it symbolize two boys that have been indoctrinated since birth that there is only one right way, the way of the leader(or perhaps the way of the priest/Imam). It's a very strong poem, casual but get nice word usage, has "flow" and leaves room for many different interpretions. Nice work.

Written by Torelli on 27.09.2006 at 23:18

Thanks to those who have commented. I'm sorry that I haven't commented in some time, but I think it is time to give it another go.

@Kariasakis7...untitled...
when I read your poem I got images of a funeral. the rain, the sorrrowful widow and the coffin that silently is sinking underground. for me this poem reflects the thoughts of this greiving widow. Beautiful in a way. I have to say something about the fourth stanza. I really like this stanza, infact it's my favorite part of this poem. However, you should really try to change the last line:

"Open and swallow
your life
Open and see sorrow
in your life
Open and follow
to your life
in silent tomb"

Do you see how the rythm gets desturbed beacuse you don't rhyme in the last sentence? It could have worked if you didn't rhyme in the first parts. Either you rephrase the stanza or you find a another word in the last sentence. Perhaps "morrow" would be a good word? Either then that, I really enjoyed it, very beautiful.

well I agree its sorrowfull poem, and I like it, and i dont remaber those fielings what I had then I shood read and try remeber

I didnt get about that what ou post, I shood change there something

Thank's for coment

@Torelli: thank you for your comment, I'm very happy that you liked it

We're All Wingless


Like a plea for help
A little voice cries out to me
A wingless angel tends to fall alone
Now a smile of vengeance appears on my face
And I can't
I can't explain it myself

Sleep the eternal
Sleep until I wake
A dirge for my sanity
And a cry for heaven's sake

How long can I wait?
To know what I've become
A screaming nightmare begs to sleep alone
Mist fills the room I once hated so much
And I can't
I can't call it home again

Sleep the eternal
Sleep until I wake
A dirge for humanity
And a cry for heaven's sake
Whispers are immortal
Secrets made of flesh
I once tasted atrophy
But my blood created such mess

Watch it die
Watch it fade
Time has no redemption
Feel alone
Feel for me
Just bleed
Just bleed my resurrection

Whispers are immortal
Secrets made of flesh
I once tasted atrophy
But my blood created such mess
Sleep the eternal
Sleep until I wake
A dirge for humanity
And a cry
I cry for heaven's sake

My Monster #2: Take A Look In The Mirror

Would it hurt you to take a look in the mirror?
Would it hurt me to take a look at your soul?
Between fire and water.
Sipping wine with you - and I remember how Sun once schorced.
Looking deep into your deep dark brown eyes.
Sea of desire.

Choaking roses on the table, drowning in spilt wine.
There is still mirror in front of us, My Monster.
Can you reach yourself in the argentine reflection?
Can you reach my hand in the argentine reflection?
And trees sway as they dance to wind's song.
Secrecy of your eyes and stillnes of your heart ... A sincere tear that has fallen on a mirror...
You saw my soul...
Desire was born...

Kisses(Wishing thay was real) I know ugly title

Kisses
Wish thay was real
Real like those mountains of truth
Real like hopes of lover

Love
Wish it die
Die like our soungs
About river who washing sands
About our love's end

Kisses
Wish thay was real
Real like crying mirror
Real like hopes of die

Kisses
Wish thay was real
Real like stories about drowned bock
Real like my never understandet flowers
And crying walls
Who cry tears from love


ehh i know its ugly realy ugly ehh Im bored thats why I wrote it

I write alot of poetry, i dont know if any of my poems are any good .. but its fun and it keeps me busy. The thing that really makes me write is reading. Reading is my inspiration. I write short stories alot too. My poems are like a .. person talking? I dont know, i just make it like this without knowing it. Here is something i just made a few days ago. Its called 'Moments Before A Tragedy'.

Its something like --
That makes life worth living.
That is until the comfort wears off ..
and youre struck back to earth.
You realise what you just did, said ..
and you want to take it all back.

I will comment sometime tomorrow, but for know, I will just post.

Autumn flame

Singing tunes
days of fragments
touching, engolving
a taste of flare
a day to share

Eyes reflecting
the dance linger
a silent curse
one moment words

Entertwined in
marple leaves
serene kisses
embracement of fortune
the clarity of emotions

Echo

They are all watching me
looking at my fake eyes
How the hell did I get here?

Not dead jet
still, sinners
and selfish souls they have

Grabbing for my feelings
their erring road isn't over
pecking out my conscience

The round is now completed
falling to the ground
tided to the floor

Screaming for my soul
haunting my mind away
this war will not end

somethinng i wrote in math class...
ironic?

RUN
RUN, and let your feeling fly
hear the beat an let it posess you
RUN, be blind of the world around you
let it fade to tones of gray
RUN, not away, but towards the future
catch it before it gets away
RUN, all alone in crowded streets
you are the only one
RUN, feel the rain and wind
the elements oppose you
RUN, feel the pavement below you
your footprints the only firm ground
RUN, untill your body fades away
a lonely, running shadow

@in a sad state: nice poem, I like it alot;
RUN, untill your body fades away
a lonely, running shadow; I like tis one best

Time for some comments...

@Frostling...We're All Wingless...
This poem is very nice, very catchy. I was worried with the title, but you delivered a good poem with a near perfect rythm in it. It would be a shame if it doesn't get a melody to accompany it.

@Phoennix...My Monster #2: Take A Look In The Mirror...
The poem has a very intense atmosphere, it's almost like you can feel it, a very nice description of a passionate meeting of two souls: And get we can feel something more, something hidden in the poem. I like the way you ended it, very strong finishing lines.

@Kariasakis7...Kisses(Wishing they were real)...
This one was hard to read, but get not bad. However, it feels like you didn't really lay down much work on it, as it feels rather casual. A little more work, and you can get a very nice poem instead of 'just' a good poem.

@Darky...Moments Before A Tragedy...
I always prefere short poems before long poems,I think you say much more with short ones. The actual poem is not bad, but I really think you should take away the word 'like' in the first sentence, as it kind of take away the feeling. I also suggest that you aid a 'just' in the fifth sentence ("You realise what you just did,just said"), to give the poem a better "flow". Other than that, it's nothing wrong with it. Welcome to the poetry thread!

@Vrana...Echo...
This time I got associations with mobbing(or memories of mobbing perhaps?).I can almost see the inner struggles of the victim that always got repressed, but get refuses to give up. You know, have a way with words that keeps the reader intrested, it's always exiting to see what comes next. Nicely done.

@in a sad state...Run...
Nice to see some new writers here! Your poem is deeper then what it appears to be. For me, it's symbolize our fear for life. When we are young, we worry about education and job, when we get children we worry about them and when we get old we worry about death. Therefore we constantly try to run from it. The poem encurage us to stop running form it, and instead accept it and embrace it. The poem has a good rythm in it, nice idea to repeat the word 'run' in every second sentence! I would like to read some more of your works.

Concave memories

Mumbeling voice
sancitity's choice
trains passing by
your life on a line

painted garden
my thoughts
is wrapping
around your throat

reflection of fear
a cheek, a single tear
clenced hands
a symbolic gesture
a way to understand

the lack of control
is a founded boundry
the connection of souls

Written by Torelli on 07.10.2006 at 21:55

Time for some comments...



@Kariasakis7...Kisses(Wishing they were real)...
This one was hard to read, but get not bad. However, it feels like you didn't really lay down much work on it, as it feels rather casual. A little more work, and you can get a very nice poem instead of 'just' a good poem.

Well hard to read you mean grammer?
I was bored in that time when I wrote it and I just saw some ugly movie, there one girl say Kisses, and one dude in my had say wish thayw a sreal, but otherwise its ugly poem, maybe for girls, thay like it, I thinking of remove it and I had new once, I drink my sparkling wine and gonna post it

thx for the feedback!
its nice when people understands that words is more than just words
(a friend of mine actually thought that it was about parcoeur

putting up an old piece

ravenous, rabid
i cant think straight...
sobbing, shivering
i'm loosing my mind!
silent, stupid
turning invisible...
laughing, lieing
i'm going insane!

Autumn who rot

I swallow sounds of cold emotions
and silant touch of crimson romance
give us shining amebrs
in autumn who rot

M sences are broken and I sleep
My hands are into sand and thay weep
and my life are lonley in autumn who rot

And Autumn who rot
Rot because of amber love



Amber Love this is contiunue of Autumn who rot, Autumn, was like intro

And Autumn who rot
Rot because of amber love

Autumn candles into my hands
Yelow flame warming northen lands
and where time cruated stories
because of amber love

Centuries when blod from neck was wine
And nifgtbirds flying in prime
because of amber love

I know time is here
For unbelivers
when birds flying around eclipse
hoping be eternal sky
because of umber love

My life's sorrows and hopes
destiny and death
are because I saw amber love

... why...

to someone I once knew

I don't understand why must it be this way
why must you go away
you know that I will always have you in my mind
in my heart even if they grind

I don't understand why they do what they do
it must be hard for you
to face them every single day but you know it's true
that i love you

I don't understand why you've chosen this path
why must you be next to death
quietly your flames burn a life full of sorrow
what remains is hollow

I don't understand why i can't hold you again
why am i going so insane
it rains with your dust on me and i cry
but anyways tears dry

I don't understand why but you were right
in many ways you could've fight
but it would have been useless to our goal
we have a different soul

I don't understand why it had to be this way
why did you have to go away
but you know you will always stay in my heart
Rest In Peace My Love

"Who I am,, You can never know"

beneath thy flesh my bones putrefy
beneath thy face my skull is grim
beneath thy brain are thoughts still sane
beneath thy heart blood pumps one name..

I, beneath thy shadow of a crucifix
makes you whole as you plead for me
supress you life as you bleed to be free
spare your blood and watch the lake endlessly
and hear tamed angels weep as you fall asleep

who I am you can never know
underneath a cloth cleansed with wounded sorrow
room is dark enough to hide all that is inside
fairly dark enough to catch a sudden flicker of light

And as I traverse beyond your forsaken world
my thoughts are still concealed and hard to behold
for I am the only one who knows about myself
judge me not on how I exist nor so anyone else

indeed pain is what makes most out of me
but one can never be sure of someones destiny
when your eyes are closed it is then you'll feel me
crawling inside your skin as your heart beats for eternity...

This is the third part of ...Of Phoenix and Monster, that follows A Wish That Remains Forever

My Monster #Eternity : ... Of Phoenix and Monster

Part III: Aequinoctium

Like a porcelain doll I danced to his words.
The clock was ticking in the background and the Sun fell down.
Room filled with cigarette smoke and the scent of last drops of red wine
Snowflakes falling from the sky like gentle tears dancing in the tender winter breeze.
I started to break... And blood tears covered porcelain doll's pale face.
He was pulling the strings and I danced no more.. For I was shattered alive...In a moment.
Broken dreams,

Night did not end yet when Sun entered and blinded my sight for a moment.
It was you, My Monster... My eternal Sun.
You heard my silent scream and cut the strings. I fell. Into your embrace.
And winter suddenly ceased...
The great garden opened.. The scent of spring roses... and the scent of you...
...Enbreathened life in me again... And you healed my wounds, My Monster.
You healed my wounds.

Illusive Tranquillity

Tranquillity,
hath thou beswayed
thy last shell?

a faint glimmer
flickering in the
eye of marple
reaching sanctity
bringing death

fevrently seeking
gazelessly staring
an havoc of insanity

tranquillity,
thy presence freezes
a fragile essence
descending in the mist

do you live for love?
for the love under the blood?
You run for blood
You cry like midnight's rain
And your falling as the drum beats. double bass.
Falling, falling...

Insane. a little more insane.
Wake up and walk backwards
Why did all the angels fly?

There is a certain cruelty between strangers.
Yes. There is a certain cruelty between us.
Insane.

Silentium. more than hostel.


This is no poetry. But i didnt know where else to put it so excuse me.
This was was writen while I was listening to Sisters of Mercy.

this one is an old one. But one of my favourites. and I think, one of my best work, I've ever written.

Profound symphony

You come as an angel in my wretched life.
I was touched by your shabby wing,
But it was just one touch,
One blue feeling in a night of end
And I didn't bear - ever again.

I met you on enthral winter day.
I cried my last tears into the lake of storms,
But these tears didn't serve me.
Neither did you or ancient paths in mystery.

Back in forest I'll remain as forgotten day.
To me every passed life will be a war.
You won't come as past angel,
But only as profound symphony.

It didn't matter if I was embraced.
It didn't matter if I was alone.
The symphony was still a guardian of my old heart
And I was forgotten in a cold forest - evermore.

22,june.2oo5
/Mari-Heleen Kasesalu

Inspiration: Novembers Doom (I'm totally in love of them and their music. They are like gods to me. Like a air to breathe or water of life to drink, to survive in this endless life).

Golem

As i run i feel no pain, as my soul is turning into stone.
As my feet melt into the sidewalk, as the rain stripes my face.

My headphones turns in to needles, turns music into adrenaline.
My empty fist tightens, turning into steel, as my lungs burn and wind plays in my hair.

I run, my boots are clapping against the street, it echoes in my head.
I am alone, but in a city filled with life, they turn into shadows i dont see.

Seeing that sky is gray, street is gray, houses gray, but my heart is flaming red, a furnace
Seeing no clock, seeing no time, black clothes, brown hair, flapping in the wind

Im going unreal, im turning insane, my body is something else
Im concrete, im steel, im stone.
golem...

But deep inside, the furnace is burning still. just a faint, faint little sound, but flaming, firey red...

in a sad state - i really loved this. the use of words and the way u combine them is great. The images you present in ur descriptions are quite extraordinary as well. It seems very confessional. I also can identify with some of the feelings described there. And i absolutely loved the end. The ... make all the diference to me.

I read some poems from you guys and you all make a good job, and with all these good poems I don't know if mines are good now, I don't thinks so, but great job you guys; so here it goes this shit written by me; hmmm no title yet...



Don't make me cry with your actions
your attitude and rejects drag tears out of my eyes
why you dared to betray me
when all the time I gave you only love
when I always gave you my trust
I put all my faith in our love

And you had to destroy everything I built
you never even cared about us
it was just spent time with someone
'cuz you're scared to loneliness
you're scared to be alone
but honey playing with other feelings is sickness

I always thought you were my someone
but too late I realized you were just a fantasy
a little boy scared to show his own way to be
you always pretending to be someone else
and I fell in love with that side amd that's not for me

Now that I discover you real side
I don't want to stay with you any longer
it cause me pain because I really loved you
but you baby don't deserve my love
I'm leaving you with my heart very cold

Taking my tears among my hands
with my heart bleeding because of your lies
with this heart still loving you
but i dont have anithing to fight

I don't regret anything I did or anything I said
it was all truth, I never cheated on you
I loved you and I still do it like I've never done before
but you were a lied, a very sweet lied
keep in mind I'll always love you
and if all this issue didn't hurt you
it's because this love never touch you

Never

Vital whispers that have never been spoken
Embraces of light to me in the dark,broken
Floods of tears in my soul take me deep
Where in silence, all colours are asleep
I'm bound to these words,i will always weep

Lay beside her,like the wind close to the sky
A savage pain keeps me far from your silenced cry
No crushing end,just me in time lost again
Where you can't exist i still search in vain
I'm tied to those whispers that are forever dead...