Band:	Emmure
Album:	Speaker Of The Dead
Style:	Metalcore
Release date:	February 15, 2011
Guest review by:	Boxcar Willy

01. Children Of Cybertron
02. Area 64-66
03. Dogs Get Put Down
04. Demons With Ryu
05. Solar Flare Homicide
06. Eulogy Of Giants
07. Bohemian Grove
08. 4 Poisons 3 Words
09. Cries Of Credo
10. Last Words To Rose
11. A Voice From Below
12. Drug Dealer Friend
13. My Name Is Thanos
14. Lights Bring Salvation
15. Word Of Intulo

What the hell did I just listen to? Well, I listened to Emmure's Speaker of the Dead, and all I can say about it is: What a pile of shit. This album ravaged and beat my eardrums for just under 40 minutes. Folks, this is bad; this album is just downright horrible. I gave this album its best chance, I listened to it with open ears, I had no bias coming in to this, and I still think it is bad. Let me explain why...

Emmure suffers from a disease called wannabe poseuritis. This disease goes straight up the anus, through the blood vessels and into the brain, where it immediately cuts off all ability to make good music. Emmure tries to be one of those "we talk about feelings and girlfriends" deathcore bands, but they just can't pull it off. The guitars are weak, adding absolutely nothing to the music. The drums are pitiful, and my grandma can scream better than Frankie Palmeri. He can barely scream at all, instead he just does this borderline yelling/talk-singing. The bass is okay - it's pretty much the only plus on this entire album. They add little tidbits of clean vocals in here too, just to piss you off even more.

Another thing that bugs me about this album is the weird effects that are added in. An example of this is the "squeal" effect added in to the breakdown of "Dog Gets Put Down". Oh, and that's another thing, the lyrics and song titles are really moronic and cheesy, and I'm talking cheese-in-a-can kind of cheesy.

...we are unstoppable / we are unbreakable / how much more proof do you want / you can't fuck with us / you can't fuck with us / we are unstoppable / how much more proof do you want (do you want)...

Those are the entire lyrics for the first song, "Children of the Cybertron", and honestly, I could write better lyrics after being bludgeoned with a baseball bat.

All I can say is that this is just a horrid album. There isn't really anything good about it to say...