[Instrumental]

Well you can ride the hennenpin crawler for a dollar
Peddle it around the world
You can ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
Impress them steam punk girls
If you ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
You'll feel that burn in your thigh
Cause when you ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
You get to touch that pie in the sky

He'll show his crusty old pickle for a nickel
Must say I'd rather not
He tried to show a girl off of florence street
He's damn lucky he didn't get caught
Fell asleep on night with a lit cigarette
As he tried to drink away his pain
When a fireman doused his burnt out shack
All they found was a greasy stain

Go go
Go go
Go go
Go go
Go

Now you can ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
And peddle your cares away
You ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
You best be prepared to pay
Cause when you ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
There's no friends or cuttin' deals
You can ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
Sweat's gonna grease them wheels

Go go
Go go
Go go
Go go
Go go
Go go
Go go
Go

He tried to buy a lotta ore for a quarter
Way back in the olden days
He sold his soul for a donut hole
He could muster the nerve to ask for a raise
She sold sea shells and other things
Down by the old sea shore
When she sold her song to a beer commercial
She looked like a filthy whore
Haha

Go go
Go go
Go go
Go

Now you can ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
Peddle it around the world
You can ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
Impress them steam punk girls
You can ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
You feel that burn in your thigh
Cause when you ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar
You get to bite that pie in the sky
You get to bite that pie in the sky
You get to bite that pie in the sky
You get to bite that pie in the sky
You get to bite that pie in the sky

Go go
Go go
Go go
Go go

Hennepin, hennepin crawler
Hennepin, hennepin crawler
Hennepin, hennepin crawler
You can ride the hennepin crawler for a dollar

The river water diverts to other places
To nurture central valley seeds
The northern waters that slosh desert fairways
Fulfill So-Cal golfers needs

The Mighty Chook, it used to run the rivers
To the grounds where they spawn
Thin numbers, as the shipping ferries waned
Pretty soon, they'll all be gone

Jimmy Mac runs the trawler of his father
Who got it passed down from his Pa
Three closed seasons, and a banknote on his shoulder
That Jimmy's hidin' from the law

Jimmy watched, as the bulk of the fleet
Sold their boats and moved away
But after the stroke, he promised to his father
He'd do his best to stay

He'd remember the days when his father used to show him
How to set the temp on the fuel?
His hand upon his shoulder, he looked out at the water
Said, "Son it is my fear, that you'll be the Last Salmon Man."

You're the Last Salmon Man
You're the Last Salmon Man
You're the Last Salmon Man, from the Macgoverner's? Clan

2010 they re-opened North Cal. Waters
To the salmon chasing slew
Four straight days, Jimmy trolled the jagged coastline
But, the fish were far and few

Jimmy watched as the bulk of the fleet
Packed their boats and moved away
But on his death bed, he promised to his father
He'd do his best to stay

He'd remember the days when his father used to show him
How to set the temp on the fuel?
His hand upon his shoulder, he looked out at the water
Said, "Son it is my fear, that you'll be the Last Salmon Man."

Last Salmon Man
He's the Last Salmon Man
He's the Last Salmon Man
He's the Last Salmon Man, from the Macgoverner's? Clan

Oh I like it
Oh man I like it

I like it, I think I'm gonna like it
I like it, I think I'm gonna like it
I like it, I really really like it
I think I'm gonna buy cause I really, really like it

Sell me something
Sell me something

Oh I like it, I really really like it
I like it, I really really like it
I like it, I think I'm gonna buy it
I think I'm gonna buy cause I really, really like it

Eternal Consumption Engine
Here in the USA
Eternal Consumption Engine
Sure do like to spend our pay
Eternal Consumption Engine
More make it more I'll buy
Eternal Consumption Engine
Slangin' out the slices of American Pie

Eternal Consumption Engine
Every time I get a little bit bored
Eternal Consumption Engine
Head to the Wally-Mart store
Eternal Consumption Engine
Livin' high on the greasy hog
Eternal Consumption Engine
As long as they don't deport my job
Eternal Consumption Engine
Cause Everything's is made in China
Eternal Consumption Engine
Everything nowadays is made in China

Eternal Consumption Engine
Eternal Consumption Engine
Eternal Consumption Engine
Eternal Consumption Engine

Eternal Consumption Engine
Eternal Consumption Engine
Eternal Consumption Engine
Eternal Consumption Engine

(Everything's made in China)
Eternal Consumption Engine
(Everything's made in China)
Eternal Consumption Engine
(Everything's made in China)
Eternal Consumption Engine
(Everything's made in China)
Eternal Consumption Engine

Everything's made in China
Everything's made in China
Everything's made in China
Everything nowadays is made in China

Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
There's no place to run and hide
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
Damn my bastard pride
From the middle of nowhere
He rides it all alone
From the edges of somewhere
He's grindin' flesh and bone
From the fringes of darkness
He breathes a steady hand
And the tinges of poison
Come seeping from his glands
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
There's no place to run and hide
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
Damn my bastard pride
If you ask him nicely
Perhaps he'll go away
Just move politely
And beg him not to stay
With a mouth full of garbage
He spits into your eye
And an ear full of pity
He'll teach you how to die
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
There's no place to run and hide
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
Goddamn my bastard pride
She stands before us
With a Bible in her grasp
When she opens her mouth up
You can hear the wretched rasp
Like a bucket of barnacles
She's abrasive to the skin
Like the ignorant masses
That hope someday she'll win
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
There's no place to run and hide
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
Damn my bastard pride
Tragedy's poundin'
Hard against your door
And the cancer's eating
At your inner core
And you're feeling helpless
Can't control the game
Do you fade away softly
Or go out in a ball of flames 'cause
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
There's no place to run and hide
Tragedy's A' Comin'
And I cannot step aside
No I cannot step aside
Damn this bastard pride

The Eyes of the Squirrel are watching The Eyes of the Squirrel are watching
The Eyes of the Squirrel are watching Barry swing his bat Piano playing
Cats Big mouth drunken whores The Eyes of the Squirrel are watching Drama
That's for free On reality tv Where's that tuna casserole The Eyes of the
Squirrel are watching The Eyes of the Squirrel are watching The Eyes of the
Squirrel are watching As we change our minds At least a half a dozen times
I will lead the reveille The Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching The
Oil's constant flow Through the Gulf of Mexico Anyone for battered shrimp?
The Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching The Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching
The Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching Some idiot start to fester Where he
Shot that child molester Some call him hero, some call him con The Eyes of
The Squirrel are Watching Another arrogant ass Says he's got an N word pass
What the hell's an N word pass The Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching The
Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching The Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching
Brad and Angeline Expand their family Who's gonna be the next Octomom The
Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching Obama wave his pecker At the
Infrastructure wreckers Sayin' what you gonna do about that gun control The
Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching The Eyes of the Squirrel are Watching

Jilly's on smack, and she won't be comin' back
No she won't be comin' back, for the holidays
Jilly's on smack, and she won't be comin' back
No she won't be comin' back, for the holidays

Jilly left home
Went to pick her own bone
She made her own
In the marketplace

Now Jilly's on smack, and she won't be comin' back
No she won't be comin' back
For these holidays

Now Jilly's on smack, and she won't be comin' back
No she won't be comin' back
For the holidays

Jilly had a smile
That spanned over a mile
She left him standing in the aisles
Of the big parade

Jilly always phoned her mother
Emailed daily to her brother
Til she took a junkie lover
And began to fade

Now Jilly's on smack, and she won't be comin' back
No she won't be comin' back
For the holidays

Jilly's on smack and she won't be comin' back
No she won't be comin' back
For the holidays

Jilly's on smack and she won't be comin' back
No she won't be comin' back
For them holidays

Got a badge, a Red Rider at Rocket Camp out at (Nohack?) Peak
Lookin' for jailbirds left and right tryin'a knock 'em up out the trees
Everybody I know's watchin' Clint, we all like watchin' Clint
Hi Hi Hi Hiii
All the li'l Snaps wanna be like Clint; they all wanna be like Clint
But I wanna be like Lee Van Cleef; ya know I wanna be like Lee
Whatever happened to Lee Van Cleef; whatever happened to Lee?

A yellow Studebaker with a 302, I see the green naugahyde
He put a coupla dings in that pick-up truck, a few more dents in his pride
At Hilltop Drive-In they're watchin' Clint; they all like watchin' Clint
Hi Hi Hi Hiii
All the babies scream they wanna see ol' Clint; they all wanna see ol'
Clint
But I wanna see Lee Van Cleef; ya know I'd like to see ol' Lee
Whatever happened to Lee Van Cleef; whatever happened to Lee?

(Just a lil ol' tease o' Ler...)

Now the Studebaker's gone, Lee's passed on, Clint's still sharp as can be
Hilltop Drive-In is an Auto Mall, but no one's built over Lee
He'll get a kick outta watchin' Clint, we all get a kick outta Clint
Hi Hi Hi Hiii
But Lee never been none quite like Clint, there's really only one Clint
But I really did like Lee Van Cleef; I sure did really like Lee
Whatever happened to Lee Van Cleef; whatever happened to Lee?

(Now for the full Ler experience...)

We still get a kick outta watchin' Clint; we all get a kick outta Clint
Hi Hi Hi Hiii
There ain't never been one quite like Clint, there's really only one Clint
I always did like Lee Van Cleef; always did like Lee
Nobody's steely like Lee Van Cleef. Whatever happened to Lee?
Whatever happened to Lee Van Cleef? Don't forget about Lee

She feeds her face with cheddar balls
As my brain cells start to pop
She licks her fingers stares away
Her I.Q. slowly drops
I pry my eyes as best I can
From that big electric stain
She feeds her face with cheddar balls
And stuffs more nonsense in her brain

Just when I thought I'd seen it all
They pull a cretin from the shelves
And flash that filth under their nails
To make us feel better about ourselves
As they ooze across the screen
Like a pustule gutted troll
We fill their coffers full of gold
And praise the skill of asshole

More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
Than just
Moron tv

More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
Than just
Moron tv

More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
Than just
Moron tv

That one's famous for a sex tape
That one's famous from her dad
That one had more babies
Than anyone's ever had
That one married a rock star
That made all the little girls squeal
And that one wants to be President
'Cause she's got moron appeal

More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
Than just
Moron tv

More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
There's gotta be
More on tv
Than just
Moron tv

I took a ride with the Green Ranger,
Stepped up and showed me lots of things.
He'd liquefy my eye and slice it up like pie,
Now at night my right ear always rings.
I took a ride with the Green Ranger,
Things were not quite what I had thought.
The (Nirvana) city fire, turned my nostril hairs to wire.
That's the night I'd nearly lost the block. (plot?)


[Incomprehensible Piker Banter]

It electrifies the night, it magnifies the sight,
Watch out or you might just lose the plot.
Who wants to ride with the Green Ranger.
It electrifies the night, it magnifies the sight,
Watch out or you might just lose the plot.
Who wants to ride with the Green Ranger.
It electrifies the night, it magnifies the sight,
Watch out or you might just lose the plot.
Who wants to ride with the Green Ranger.
It electrifies the night, it magnifies the sight,
Watch out or you might just lose the plot.
Who wants to ride with the Green Ranger.

How 'bout one of them foot long sandwiches?
Got some tasty cola right here

Now look at that Chevy go
She's faster than greased up lightning

Soda pops and pimple cream will gladly kick ya down the green
Just coat your cred with vaseline and shove it up your ass

I used to be a pimp
But now I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoinfodaman
I used to be a pimp
But now I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoin' for the advertising
Advertising man

Oh man, that's a juicy burger
Crispy on them fries please

I used to be a pimp
But now I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoinfodaman
I used to be a pimp
But now I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoin' for the advertising
Advertising man

(He used to be a pimp
But now he's hoinfodaman
He's hoinfodaman
He's hoinfodaman
He used to be a pimp
But now he's hoinfodaman
He's hoin' for the advertising
Advertising man)

Soda pops and pimple cream will always kick ya down the green
But the worst thing about ol' Charlie Sheen is when Hanes, they sold his ass

I used to be a pimp
But now I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoinfodaman
I used to be a pimp
But now I'm hoinfodaman
I'm hoin' for the advertising
Advertising man

He used to be a pimp
But now he's hoinfodaman
He's hoinfodaman
He's hoinfodaman
He used to be a pimp
But now he's hoinfodaman
He's hoin' for the advertising
Advertising man

Today is going to be the greatest day of your life
Today is going to be the greatest day of your life
Today is going to be the greatest day of your life

With a head full of pancakes, a gut full of rot
He shoots from the hip for one final
Extinction burst
Extinction burst
Extinction burst
Extinction burst

He ran like a bastard and jumped like an ape
He left the crowd cheering his one final
Extinction burst
Extinction burst
Extinction burst
Extinction burst

Extinction burst
Extinction burst
Extinction burst
Extinction burst

Randy throws fastballs like man's never known
Kobayashi ate hot dogs to take the throne
The avocado is shedding its pit
Beef on a pancake to a tree don't mean shit
Extinction burst
Extinction burst
Extinction burst
Extinction burst

Today is going to be the greatest day of your life
Today is going to be the day you get up on your heels and fight
In the face of all that you disdain you will burn so bright

Extinction burst

Last salmon man
The last salmon man
The last salmon man
The last salmon man

Last salmon man
The last salmon man
The last salmon man
The last salmon man

Last salmon man
The last salmon man
The last salmon man
The last salmon man