Second chances for none -only wasted time.
Time crawls forward, grief slowly draws the line.

Your warmth, my phantom limb.
Life’s weight leaking in.
What waits below, i’ll find out.
Words of hope, never leave my mouth.
Death takes until the earth needs to eat.
The balance of power, sitting just below my feet.

Claws sink in, closer to the void.
We find our worth in the wounds of the dirt.
Discomfort only means I can feel
This reflection hides the weight of my burdens
Discomfort of a truth concealed
Every second this condition worsens

Crossed over to a hollow hold
Introspective as a means of growing
Picked apart all the treasures from the shipwreck
Finding solace in a lack of knowing
Wrapped in silk and a gold embrace
Barreled out to an absolute atrocity
Navigating through this hellish landscape
Just to settle in eternal mediocrity

And as the flowers retreat into seed
I stare jealous at decomposition
Within the wilt is a chance at rebirth
A new bloom in a rising sun

Tangled in it, I lost my grip.
I crawl back
I lost myself yet I am clawing clawing
I lost myself yet I am clawing back

How soon comes the last time ever
Beyond ineffable and nothing gets better
Unbecoming just a miserable subject
Apathetic as an underlying side effect
Spanning time with lack of purpose
I want so badly just to feel
We dig we dig deeper to the core
Eternal sleep has such appeal

Gods will
Falling away
Pain grows
It breaks a part of me
Inherit
A damage
Dismissed
It takes that part of me

Pulled back like the ash on a cigarette
Burnt up and crushed down just the same
Disposable and as easy forgotten
I’m your relief to circumvent the pain

Statements need validity,
and my pain needs an identity.
Hold myself up,
just to make myself the enemy.

These worlds hold no value,
But the slope they paint is steep.
Make them feel my pain,
When i’m choking six feet deep.

Unlearning the damage
I’ve knit myself within
To break free of trauma
Grown beneath my skin
A mangled nail
Lodged so deep in the wall
A trap door exit
From my own downfall

Will I ever get to heaven?
If I can only look down
A calculated Armageddon
Under this burdening crown

Fog settles outside a weeping home,
The sound of nothing is begging to atone.
Time again, spent learning to make the way.
The bonds i held so closely, leading me away.
Inherit their pain, just to see them as weak.
It’s looming over me until it’s hard to speak.
Battle to the end, to never see the peak.
See the apathy grow when they struggle to their feet.

Circumstance makes no amends.
Just a hungry animal trying to fend.
Too stuck in the muck, to see it out
Your shortest chain, snagged on doubt.

Broken teeth yet I am smiling bright
I can’t retreat from my endless fight

Every lesion another reminder
I’ll place my wishes on the luckiest scar
Check my pulse cuz I have failed to feel it
We’ll push to find a new metaphor

Echoes in different iterations.
Head against the wall without hesitation
Always running from shame and this vain hatred.

Scream silent with your head underwater
Pain knocking on the doors of my eyes
A wolf cry shows a path to the slaughter
I’ve paved the road to my inherent demise
Give it up to try it again
The liquid soothe is just a means to an end
We’ll stick our head in the hornets nest
And contemplate which morrow manifests

Hiding from the bullets i need to gnaw.
The gnashing of teeth, until the flesh runs raw.
Testing fate for my delusions.
This reluctant descent into seclusion.

I’ve sheltered these vices,
Not me but my foe.
Take a final step,
Facing whats below.

Tower of cards, your honesty
In what you present
Resentment forged, a fallacy
How quick we forget
Garden of snakes lay coiled
at the base of your feet
Out of your mouth emerging
Is a web of deceit

All the world is all a stage
A setting dressed for you
The windowpane as clear as day
The lie in perfect view

A constant shift to stay away
Controlling what you do.
A straining fate, to cement in place
Dying to come through.

To fabricate reality
With selfish intent
Manipulate the scenery
Into what you invent
Crocodile tears stream slowly
As you conjure the myth
Accepting lies whole hearted
As a case of respite

A veil of gray, shattering
Behind the fraud
A constant front, burdening,
All their applause.
Daft in depth and veracity.
Hiding in sight.
Panning liability,
This same old plight.

All the world is all a stage
A setting dressed for you
The windowpane as clear as day
The lie in perfect view

A constant shift to stay away
Controlling what you do.
A straining fate, to cement in place
Dying to come through.

Narcissism as a mode of operation
To love and ruin as a dual fascination
Without control you lack a sense of intent
Constant creation of a truth to augment

Power comes from the things that you take,
A youngling, another spirit to break.
Poisoned supply, from the hand that gives.
A cold shoulder, no force to forgive.

Am I not worthy of love
I’m not proud of my accomplishments either
Does it find you after all?
Is this bond instated by survivors

So take this gift
That you bestowed on me
And hold it over my head so affectionately
A simple vow to provide and protect
I’ll feel the weight of it forever on my neck

This frail bond that led me astray,
A beacon to home and a road to dismay.
I see the strain when it’s time to connect
I feel the resent with the loss of respect.

Validation through pain,
The act of love never without restrain.
Beg for all that you get,
A life ruined, already spent.
Find comfort in the mirage,
Pains color, your hidden flaws.
The festering wound, and the trail of deceit.
A shift of power, and the anguish at your feet.

A simple vow to deter from the wreck
I’ll feel the weight of shame wrapped around my neck
A paper crane wish shot into the sky
I dream one day to never have to live a lie

The burden i never chose to be,
All the weight that’s forced on me.
Regrets on the life you spent,
A figure for all you resent.

Delicate, desolate
I’m undeserving of any of it
Scared of happiness
We shy away
Rejecting bounties as the anguish purveys
No not again
The truth has shackled you down
Prevented you from the mend

To see there’s nothing,
To save what is dead.
Looking through the pane,
And nothing connects.

A charitable love, and a lifetime of spite.
A coward in hiding, a dog without the bite.
The sufferer of self, and all that it brings.
The moments you wept, and the mercy it brings.
Spigot of truth runs
But my mouth is dry.
Years of the inevitable,
To see i’m cast aside.
Looking through the pane, nothing can connect.
It takes the final bite,
the force that breaks the neck.

Cold dead eyes,
And everything they take.

Swimming against the fire
With my insides filled full of gasoline

To see there’s nothing,
To save what is dead.
Looking through the pane,
And nothing connects.
The words of yesterday,
The weight of tomorrow.
Forever burning paths,
Hiding from sorrow.

I’ve had enough this time
I’ve had enough of drowning

Another tide washes you clean
Absolved in salt as a common routine

Closer to the end than the start
The years I gain make me sickly and stark
The weight of time, feigning,
Growing colder and dark.

Equal to myself, with years in between.
The stagnation continues splitting the seams.
Unraveling and turning to a mess.
Stuck between the dirt and the rest.

Caught in the shade of progress,
And the changes I missed.
The stairs of life and the steps I skipped.

These concrete decisions for a temporary being.
The weight of the world has always been my name.

Doe caught in a cross hairs range
Behind the hedges rests amity’s gun
Shot blank in a raptured exchange
We have finally found the sun
Upholding everything
When I am splitting up at the seems
Previously riddled with emotional drought
Your eyes have cancelled all considerable doubt

A stray dog led to warmth
The glow of trust and faith
In this I’ve been disarmed
In you I feel so safe
And where we used to run
Those doors have all been locked
I’ll never sail alone
This ship has finally docked