Lloyd Boyd was conspiranoid
Barking chemtrails in the skies
Claiming Bill Gates had put microchips
In all the chicken pot pies

Launching himself in his lawn chair
Proving the earth was flat
Microwaving his burritos
Now he only wears his tinfoil hat

Conspiranoia
Conspiranoia
Conspiranoia

Marion Barrion Contrarian
Felt Dr Tony was selling her lies
So to keep from getting the big bad flu
She sprinkled cat urine into her eyes

With garlic cloves in her nostrils
And dryer sheets taped to her head
Marion Barrion Contrarian
Is now stinking up a hospital bed

Conspiranoia
Conspiranoia
Conspiranoia

Can lead a horse to water
But you cannot make him drink
You can guide a fool towards logic
But you'll rarely make him think

Be wary of conspiranoia
As purveyors abound
For an open mind too open
Spills its contents on the ground

Conspiranoia
Conspiranoia
Conspiranoia

Let me tell you something about Betty White
That the lamestream media won't report
She died of a COVID booster shot
She was also Barbara Bush's secret sister

Cow dung will protect everyone
It's scientifically proven that cow dung is anti-radiation
This is a chip that can be used in mobile phones to reduce radiation
It'll safeguard people against diseases

Which leads us to chemtrails
Scientists and governments are seeding the atmosphere
Implementing biological warfare and population control
And geoengineering a race of superhuman Jews

The Anunnaki were a race of extraterrestrial beings
Came to earth around five hundred thousand years ago
In order to mine gold
They are a race of blood-drinking, shape-shifting alien reptiles
And have infiltrated the Bush family, Margaret Thatcher, Bob Hope, and the British royals, among others

JFK Jr. is alive and well
He did not die in a plane crash off the coast Martha's Vineyard in '99
He's gonna reappear in Dealey Plaza fifty-eight years after his father's assassination
To announce that he'll be Donald Trump's running mate in 2024

The earth is not a sphere
And evidence has been faked or suppressed
To hide the fact that it is instead a disc
Or a single infinite plane
GPS devices are rigged to make aircraft pilots wrongly believe
That they are flying around the globe

The campfire in California
Destroyed over a hundred and fifty-three thousand acres
Eighteen thousand structures, is that really possible?
If it was caused by a downed power line
Why did numerous witnesses
Do you really believe it's coincidence that the fires also burned
The areas of Jerry Brown's projected seventy-seven million-dollar high speed railway project
'Cause I don't
Not when the evidence is right in front of our faces
Jewish space lasers

Look at that there fool
Talkin' lots of shine
To turkeys in the rain
Filling heads with brine
A fancy little fool
With fancy little ways
Churning bullshit into butter
'Cause butter always pays

But who's the bigger fool?
Is it the fool?
Is it the fool who follows the fool?
Is it the fool who follows the fool, who follows the fool?
Or the fool who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool, who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool, who follows the-

Look at that there fool
Playing dirty tricks
He must be made of Teflon
'Cause nothing ever sticks
Dancing 'round the room
While fartin' in the breeze
Friends huff it down
Like it's American cheese

So who's the bigger fool?
Is it the fool?
Is it the fool who follows the fool?
Is it the fool who follows the fool, who follows the fool?
Or the fool who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool, who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool, who follows-

Look at that there fool
Still talkin' shine
If he don't get his way
He'll bitch and piss and whine
He can't complete a sentence
Can barely complete a thought
A mouth so full of lies
You'd think his tongue would surely rot

But who's the bigger fool?
Is it the fool?
Is it the fool who follows the fool?
Is it the fool who follows the fool, who follows the fool?
Or the fool who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool, who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool?
The fool who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool
Who follows the fool, who follows the fool

Uh-huh, uh-huh

Ow, you think you can
Ow, wiggle through a minefield
Well, he'll be damned
If he's goin' to step on a "plan-dama-peel"
He's well inclined
To thumb down a bug he's squashin'
Oh, but never mind (Ha, ha)
About Erin on the side of caution, no

And we're panties down
Tongue dancin' out in front of the crowd
Conspiranoid (Huh)
Makin' savage cynical, loud and proud
A bag a-beans (Hoo-ha, huh)
Only meant for corn-hole tossin'
Express yourself
While Erin on the side of caution

Uh-huh, uh-huh
Uh-huh, uh-huh

Ow, inoculate
Oh, cover your face with a rag
Procrastinate (Hoo-ha, look out)
Sell another coupla' body bags
Oh, wash your mind (He-he, he-ha)
From the rabbit hole of Macintoshin'
Be responsible (Hoo-hoo-hoo-ha)
Try Erin on the side of caution

Uh-huh, uh-huh
I'ma Erin on the side of caution
Uh-huh, uh-huh (Huh-huh)
I'ma Erin on the side of caution
Uh-huh, uh-huh (Huh-ha)
I'ma Erin on the side of caution
Uh-huh, uh-huh
Uh-huh, uh-huh (Oof)
Erin on the side of caution